Like Jerry Springer
Without Prejudice
Wayne my friend thinks my life is like an episode of the Jerry Springer Show. I used to get offended and then I realised he is absolutely right. There's swearing, tantrums, hissy fits, vicious snits. You name it we can mess it up. I'm an impatient, bossy controlling bitch. Allegedly All us females are Alpha Females, allegedly. We think we are nice, supportive, kind and caring and we muddle through life and try and have fun.
But we have all been through the best of times and the worst of times. And we tend to not take life that seriously and laugh at it and ourselves as much as we can. We cannot stay in the same rom for more than five minutes before a fight breaks out. There may be slaps, storming off or objects thrown. There will be threats made to never speak to each other AGAIN.
We cut each other off Facebook several times a year. Then get over it. We then stick together like shit to a blanket. My girls are now grown women. they tower over me and I am always trying top play peacemaker. They managed fine without me around while I was in Queensland for three months.
In fact they are all fine and have come through the bad years and made it through the other side to be wonderful mothers and partners and good human beings in the world. But we have a long history of having to deal with more than our share of strange people.
Don't ask me why we attract dick heads, male and female, but we do. It could be that Yvette is a little over the top. If she's not happy the whole street knows about it. And she's scared of no one, so everyone cops it.
I always try and act discreet and fix all the things around the house. I only hate mowing lawns and picking up dog poo. Ugh. I do all the big stuff and even though there are 7 males in the house at the front where Yvette and the boys live, are all inclined to fade into the background when it comes to Boy Jobs.
You know the saying, you have one boy, you get a boy, two boys half a boy and three boys, no boy at all. But apart from being able to write a novel on laziness around the house, they work, do well at school and are quiet and respectful. I think it's in rebellion against their outrageous Mother and Grandmother as they despair of us ever being normal.
We have fun too though, no one can make us laugh like them. And they tend to be dramatic so it gets pretty crazy at times. every day is like Groundhog Day. For me thats pick up all the toys and stuff the two little boys of four and two have thrown all over it the yard. They come knocking every morning, looking for me, and Inhave to stop writing and go to them.
They run in all smiles and hugs and wanting food and stories. Cruz , 2 will say everything is WOW. When I brought the Flokati rug into my unit out the back, they lay down and did snow angels in the thick white pile. So did the cat, and I love walking over it in bare feet.
Even though I say groundhog day, no one day is the same and no day is normal. And it's a job I love. I help Yvette with the kids as its easier. we can't find a Dad substitute yet, but one that worked and is normal would be good. must love kids.
If my favourite passion is kids my favourite occupation is writing and I have rich fodder all around me to draw on.
Friday morning in my pjs I cursed and swore as I wrestled the six bins we have out to the street. Trying not to wake the sleeping sloth of a female Husky. It's a trial as she wants to get out and if she does she tends to mush as if she were on the steppes, instead of an ordinary street in Oz. The only way she can be caught is with Yvette flying down the street in the People Mover with boys Hanging out of doors and windows. One of them leaps on her back and wrestles her into the van.
we have a designated bin boy, but he tends to forget. He always has a date with C.O.D. Or his bed and like all the teen boys, grunts, ignores, shrugs and only gets excited around food. they are also one big walking hormone and seem stunned most of the time. I defy anyone to have a full on conversation with just one of them ands they always bring extras. The house has eight in it at the moment.
Yvette,s
Wayne my friend thinks my life is like an episode of the Jerry Springer Show. I used to get offended and then I realised he is absolutely right. There's swearing, tantrums, hissy fits, vicious snits. You name it we can mess it up. I'm an impatient, bossy controlling bitch. Allegedly All us females are Alpha Females, allegedly. We think we are nice, supportive, kind and caring and we muddle through life and try and have fun.
But we have all been through the best of times and the worst of times. And we tend to not take life that seriously and laugh at it and ourselves as much as we can. We cannot stay in the same rom for more than five minutes before a fight breaks out. There may be slaps, storming off or objects thrown. There will be threats made to never speak to each other AGAIN.
We cut each other off Facebook several times a year. Then get over it. We then stick together like shit to a blanket. My girls are now grown women. they tower over me and I am always trying top play peacemaker. They managed fine without me around while I was in Queensland for three months.
In fact they are all fine and have come through the bad years and made it through the other side to be wonderful mothers and partners and good human beings in the world. But we have a long history of having to deal with more than our share of strange people.
Don't ask me why we attract dick heads, male and female, but we do. It could be that Yvette is a little over the top. If she's not happy the whole street knows about it. And she's scared of no one, so everyone cops it.
I always try and act discreet and fix all the things around the house. I only hate mowing lawns and picking up dog poo. Ugh. I do all the big stuff and even though there are 7 males in the house at the front where Yvette and the boys live, are all inclined to fade into the background when it comes to Boy Jobs.
You know the saying, you have one boy, you get a boy, two boys half a boy and three boys, no boy at all. But apart from being able to write a novel on laziness around the house, they work, do well at school and are quiet and respectful. I think it's in rebellion against their outrageous Mother and Grandmother as they despair of us ever being normal.
We have fun too though, no one can make us laugh like them. And they tend to be dramatic so it gets pretty crazy at times. every day is like Groundhog Day. For me thats pick up all the toys and stuff the two little boys of four and two have thrown all over it the yard. They come knocking every morning, looking for me, and Inhave to stop writing and go to them.
They run in all smiles and hugs and wanting food and stories. Cruz , 2 will say everything is WOW. When I brought the Flokati rug into my unit out the back, they lay down and did snow angels in the thick white pile. So did the cat, and I love walking over it in bare feet.
Even though I say groundhog day, no one day is the same and no day is normal. And it's a job I love. I help Yvette with the kids as its easier. we can't find a Dad substitute yet, but one that worked and is normal would be good. must love kids.
If my favourite passion is kids my favourite occupation is writing and I have rich fodder all around me to draw on.
Friday morning in my pjs I cursed and swore as I wrestled the six bins we have out to the street. Trying not to wake the sleeping sloth of a female Husky. It's a trial as she wants to get out and if she does she tends to mush as if she were on the steppes, instead of an ordinary street in Oz. The only way she can be caught is with Yvette flying down the street in the People Mover with boys Hanging out of doors and windows. One of them leaps on her back and wrestles her into the van.
we have a designated bin boy, but he tends to forget. He always has a date with C.O.D. Or his bed and like all the teen boys, grunts, ignores, shrugs and only gets excited around food. they are also one big walking hormone and seem stunned most of the time. I defy anyone to have a full on conversation with just one of them ands they always bring extras. The house has eight in it at the moment.
Yvette,s
