d Then Germaine Greer Happened
Without Prejudice
In the mid seventies while I had my 3rd baby, suddenly the Feminist Movement reached Australia. The rumblings beginning for me in Joan Baez and Janis Joplin. I loved their rebelliousness against social niceties. Their songs of protest and their willingness to not belong to a blonde Barbie club in their look left a big impression on me.
Australia then still a Patriarchal system pretty much and still is, really. Women at times their own worst enemies, fighting amongst themselves, but we are only human and therefore frail to mistakes.
So are the men but we just don't let them know this as their egos are more fragile than ours. I think thats absolute hogwash. So the men of that time were fairly uncomplicated, worked, provided an income for their families and Stepford Wife would support them and look after them, giving them the 3 chops and ourselves the one.
I had a hubby that only had to click his fingers and I would come running. That wasn't just him, all men were like that. And then Germaine Greer told women to stand up and roar and the anthem was "I Am Woman".
I didn't exactly burn my bra, my boobs were too big, but all women started looking up at that moment. Sensing a change to old order, sniffing the air of freedom, just around the corner. And it hit like a Tidal Wave and then nothing was the same again.
Women had "No Fault Divorce" and a single parent pension, all at the same time and access to health care for little cost and all those things combined made for freedom for women in my neighbourhood. It was still the seventies as well in that it was a stable decade. Money was better, conditions were better, Australia had started to come of age.
Pretty soon we realised without financial issues and keeping a strict budget and with family help we could leave unhappy marriages, or stay and get them to leave. Or complain a lot and punish him every second for not being ideal. There weren't too many women that outspoken then.
And some of us wanted to keep trying, in love, and wanting to make things better. When the first one decided to end a marriage it was shocking, literally and we were all in awe of her. We muttered amongst ourselves, saying good on her to each other, all meeting up at a Mary Kay or Tupperware party, so we could drink cheap wine and eat kabana on sticks in our lime green or orange kitchens and moan about our husbands.
Moaning about husbands was De Rigeur, and we all chimed in. men were this and men were that and I didn't moan about mine as he was nuts as far as I was concerned. And I feared him. he was clever too, very jealous and possessive and he worked his ring out for us, the family.
So he said.
I was so naive and trusting I believed everything he said. I wanted a happy family with good times and fun, like my family had been. But that was a silly mistake and the more I got into the marriage I realised I was in a comfortable trap which I liked and hated at the same time.
I always liken it to living in a play. Nothing is ever normal, no conversation, no emotion, for the highly insecure it's about control. Fearing loss more than the rewards of gain. You have a feeling underneath their demeanour you are their "work Of Art", they are going to "make you over", not for your benefit but so you will become more like the "Saint", they have put on a pedestal.
And that is what other people see, only the one hundredth of that life writhing around underneath its metaphorical iceberg. Only the tiny tip showing, the tip of perfection. The shiny kids, the new car, kitchen extension, bundles of cash, diamond rings and furs, it's almost like you run out of things to buy.
It's no challenge to go shopping any more as you know you can buy just about anything. Almost boring in a way, no longer having the anticipation, the saving, the sacrifices made.It's nice to see people genuinely delighted for you, for doing well, making an outer showing of deferring to your opinion as if pearls drop out of your mouth. And you know it's lovely but deadly seductive.
No one alive is that right mix of ego and non ego as they are human beings, not robots. No human alive is that pure, well maybe all the religious deities but everyone else struggles with perfection. We know ourselves better than anyone, and sooner or later we have to make peace with our darker selves, related to survival.
And then we need to surround ourselves with great friends and family who are always there for you, no matter what. And if you are extremely lucky they are the type of people that love you enough to tell you to stay grounded. I am lucky enough to have strong family siblings, who are all successful in their own lives and positive thinkers and we all bounce off each other when we get together.
And Sibling rivalry is still alive and glowing in my family and we give each other heaps of praise and heaps of ticking off if we so desire. I play Germaine Greer to my brothers distrust of females and the tell me what bastards men really are, not because they're bastards, they just know men are fairly selfish. And if they are honest, they will be honest about it.
Women love to take care of things, so there you have it. I myself find them fabulous, men, but they take up too much of my time. For the moment anyway. being me I will always change my mind and that's my prerogative, as any woman should be able to...... xoxox
Love Janette
In the mid seventies while I had my 3rd baby, suddenly the Feminist Movement reached Australia. The rumblings beginning for me in Joan Baez and Janis Joplin. I loved their rebelliousness against social niceties. Their songs of protest and their willingness to not belong to a blonde Barbie club in their look left a big impression on me.
Australia then still a Patriarchal system pretty much and still is, really. Women at times their own worst enemies, fighting amongst themselves, but we are only human and therefore frail to mistakes.
So are the men but we just don't let them know this as their egos are more fragile than ours. I think thats absolute hogwash. So the men of that time were fairly uncomplicated, worked, provided an income for their families and Stepford Wife would support them and look after them, giving them the 3 chops and ourselves the one.
I had a hubby that only had to click his fingers and I would come running. That wasn't just him, all men were like that. And then Germaine Greer told women to stand up and roar and the anthem was "I Am Woman".
I didn't exactly burn my bra, my boobs were too big, but all women started looking up at that moment. Sensing a change to old order, sniffing the air of freedom, just around the corner. And it hit like a Tidal Wave and then nothing was the same again.
Women had "No Fault Divorce" and a single parent pension, all at the same time and access to health care for little cost and all those things combined made for freedom for women in my neighbourhood. It was still the seventies as well in that it was a stable decade. Money was better, conditions were better, Australia had started to come of age.
Pretty soon we realised without financial issues and keeping a strict budget and with family help we could leave unhappy marriages, or stay and get them to leave. Or complain a lot and punish him every second for not being ideal. There weren't too many women that outspoken then.
And some of us wanted to keep trying, in love, and wanting to make things better. When the first one decided to end a marriage it was shocking, literally and we were all in awe of her. We muttered amongst ourselves, saying good on her to each other, all meeting up at a Mary Kay or Tupperware party, so we could drink cheap wine and eat kabana on sticks in our lime green or orange kitchens and moan about our husbands.
Moaning about husbands was De Rigeur, and we all chimed in. men were this and men were that and I didn't moan about mine as he was nuts as far as I was concerned. And I feared him. he was clever too, very jealous and possessive and he worked his ring out for us, the family.
So he said.
I was so naive and trusting I believed everything he said. I wanted a happy family with good times and fun, like my family had been. But that was a silly mistake and the more I got into the marriage I realised I was in a comfortable trap which I liked and hated at the same time.
I always liken it to living in a play. Nothing is ever normal, no conversation, no emotion, for the highly insecure it's about control. Fearing loss more than the rewards of gain. You have a feeling underneath their demeanour you are their "work Of Art", they are going to "make you over", not for your benefit but so you will become more like the "Saint", they have put on a pedestal.
And that is what other people see, only the one hundredth of that life writhing around underneath its metaphorical iceberg. Only the tiny tip showing, the tip of perfection. The shiny kids, the new car, kitchen extension, bundles of cash, diamond rings and furs, it's almost like you run out of things to buy.
It's no challenge to go shopping any more as you know you can buy just about anything. Almost boring in a way, no longer having the anticipation, the saving, the sacrifices made.It's nice to see people genuinely delighted for you, for doing well, making an outer showing of deferring to your opinion as if pearls drop out of your mouth. And you know it's lovely but deadly seductive.
No one alive is that right mix of ego and non ego as they are human beings, not robots. No human alive is that pure, well maybe all the religious deities but everyone else struggles with perfection. We know ourselves better than anyone, and sooner or later we have to make peace with our darker selves, related to survival.
And then we need to surround ourselves with great friends and family who are always there for you, no matter what. And if you are extremely lucky they are the type of people that love you enough to tell you to stay grounded. I am lucky enough to have strong family siblings, who are all successful in their own lives and positive thinkers and we all bounce off each other when we get together.
And Sibling rivalry is still alive and glowing in my family and we give each other heaps of praise and heaps of ticking off if we so desire. I play Germaine Greer to my brothers distrust of females and the tell me what bastards men really are, not because they're bastards, they just know men are fairly selfish. And if they are honest, they will be honest about it.
Women love to take care of things, so there you have it. I myself find them fabulous, men, but they take up too much of my time. For the moment anyway. being me I will always change my mind and that's my prerogative, as any woman should be able to...... xoxox
Love Janette
