First Married
Without Prejudice
I was a child when i first met Bob. I was 16, brainy, nerdy, attractive enough in my own way. My fiance Nev once said of me, ( I met him when I was 42 and divorced, he was just a pup of 30 )
I got better looking as I got older, losing the puppy fat and turning fiercer as I got older and especially after Lauren died. And being divorced from Bob.
But when we were first married, after our disastrous honeymoon, we were waiting on our first baby being born and we were very happy and very much in love. I was on the farm when Bob first asked me to join him in the bath. We were engaged then and had had our engagement party in the hay shed. Bathing together became a habit of ours for many years. Bob would always call out to me "Nette Nette" and I would have to stop whatever I was doing and join him in the bath. Then we would play stupid silly sexy games, but we thought they were fun.
He would also come and get me when I was heavily pregnant and after Debbie was born, with the truck from Otter Fencing and grab me and we would go on adventures to wherever he had to deliver goods.
Cat Stevens and Kris Kristofferson tunes playing in the background. we were young and in love and we were invincible against the world. We lived in a flat in Murrumbeena in the first year of our marriage. An upstairs flat. My brother George boarded with us and he was easy company. His board money bought our food every week. And all these years later, George can still not look at sausage mince. After I had Debbie I used to walk to Permewans in Murrumbeena and do the weekly grocery shop, butchers last, for mainly sausage meat. And my one treat a week was a plain hamburger and a can of coke, costing me all up 23 c.
Bob and I had a great love life in those days, he was not as affectionate as I was, nor as demonstrative as I was, but I figured that would iron itself out down the track. We did all the normal things couples do, going to clubs and the Show and concerts and always there was the farm and Poowong dances with Drake and His Dragons. One time when we were just engaged some drunken louts took a swing out of the window of a car as we exited the Saturday night dance. The iron bar they were waving missed me by inches as they rounded a corner directly in front of us. Lawrie Thomas who was sporting an ingrown toenail dragged me back out of harms way.
We met up with all Bob's cousins in the main street and the males decided these drunken yahoos, must be stopped. Bob was always called Oscar in those day, especially by his cousins, and the reason for the name was that when younger had sported a hairstyle like Oscar Hammerstein. So Oscar and the "boys" were going on the trail of the drunken yahoos and we girls were going too. Just then the hapless drunks came back into town and did a slow circle of the main car park square and took of with a loud screech of tires and a spurt of gravel
So there were about 5 cars, of us, Ken Salmon, Graeme Hancock, Robin Hancock, (Same name as Bob, Robin Hancock ) and we were off in screech of wheels as well and in hot pursuit of the fast offenders. we went for miles and miles and just when we had about enough, the drunks came to a dead end. They jumped out od their cars and ran out into the paddocks. Their eyes blinded by our headlights, two of them ran straight for us. So all the boys hopped out and beat the shit out of them. Bob was the most savage and kept pounding away at this one guy, and just would not stop. The other boys had to pull him off the young kid.
There was much rejoicing in the car on the way home. George had hit someone too and although not one to punch people, he was young, male and aggressive, that 19 year old bravado, when the blood sings in your ears and crossing over to be adult male usually requires, some sort of pain from injury. We were a merry lot, young looking for kicks in an otherwise dull town, Bob was clearly an Alpha Male with a loud voice that brooked no argument. he was in his element with his "boys" but had begun to show signs of being emotionally cold.
We kept the relationship hidden pretty much from his dad. He pulled me aside at one stage and said,
You're not thinking of going out with that Bastard, are you ?"
I looked at him, how had he guessed what was going through my mind ??
I asked him why not,
"Because he a shit, he was arrested by the cops at Matthew Flinders Hotel and tried to knock out the cop when the cop said
"What's your name, Whiskers?"
"Not fucking whiskers", Bob replied and duly was locked up in the back of the divvie wagon, where he kicked and carried on, so the police gave him a flogging back at the station for good measure.
"I'm not going out with him", I firmly replied.
I didn't want to lose his Father Tiny's respect. I adored him and he was so good to me. He was a substitute for my Dad, who I missed.
We were married in Sydney about a year after that conversation and Tiny would not come to the wedding and wouldn't talk to me for ages. Not until I had Debbie and then he was the same as before. He loved the baby and made allowances for our being together, but I could tell he never really approved. So once we were married and "legal" as a couple we were able to be ourselves a lot more.
Bob took me, 8 months pregnant and George to see Zabriskie Point at the Oakleigh drive in. It was the first movie that said the word fuck and it was a big deal in those innocent days. You had to be 18 to enter.
The attendant was silly enough to ask Bob.
"How old is your girlfriend?"
Bob snorted and without turning his head said,
"She's not my fucking girlfriend, she's my wife"
I was in my bathrobe, mindst you, nothing else fitted and it made for an interesting outfit as I made numerous trips to the toilet.
The movie was not much, a man wrote the word FUCK in the sand and the rest was fairly ordinary and we 3 had a hard time understanding any of it. Bob loved CLOCKWORK ORANGE, I hated it. He liked the violence and nudity. It was a rude movie for those days and had originated in Britain, a fact I was inordinately proud of. but I still hated it and I can't watch it now. I can't watch "Sleepimg With The Enemy " either. Urgh, a shiver goes through me at that Movie, too close to life.
But mainly we were happy when first married. We went out with friends, drank, played cards, watched telly, went to the farm most weekends. we liked to be at home as well. we all got along pretty well and met George's girlfriend Karin and his best friend, Ivan Muncin. (Strangely enough I am still friends with both of them now ). We had other mutual friends as well and Bob's sister Pauline and her boyfriend, Ross, who had met up at our wedding. It was momentous when Debbie was born, we both adored her and took her every where with us. In that way Bob was good, he loved babies, having younger siblings, who he teased mostly and made fun of.
They were adorable his younger siblings. Ivan a white haired boy of 9, who was the greatest little shyster when it came to asking for things. Well, not asking, hinting. I worked in Myers when 16 in Childrens Books (apt) and brought home toys for Ivan and Kerrie. A whole set of hot wheels, for Ivan, the track, the cars, the lot. Ivan loved it but soon began hinting for more cars, I just laughed at his boldness. he was so cute as was Kerrie with her fierceness and toughness and her cute lisp. They were wonderful kids and I treated them as if they were my siblings.
I had Debbie on November 25th, an incredibly hot day. She was squished a bit but otherwise perfect and had a tan. The first morning they brought the baby for a feed, I rang the buzzer as soon as the Nurse had exited the room.
"This is not my baby" I said to her.
She looked at me in that way some nurses have perfected, the silly new Mummy face.
"Of course, it's your baby Mrs Hancock"
"My baby has a tanned face, this baby is pink and white"
She grabbed up the baby and unwrapped her on the bed. She took a look at the babies wristband and looked at me in some alarm.
"oops sorry, Mrs Hancock, my apologies, this is not your baby.
The ladies at Otters told me how proud Bob was of his new baby,He kept saying in wonderment they told me.
"it's a girl, a girl, We thought we were having a boy"
These were tender words coming out of the rough gate welder who looked like Ned Kelly. Bob in those days sported a beard and mo and did for years. The ladies at work were in awe of him and left him alone until he and I had the baby and then he was all smiles.
Bob literally adored Debbie and we were such young 18 ans 24 parents and so protective of her. We never let any one mind her until she was 8 months old and then we were at the baby sitters doorstep at 7am the next morning, missing her and wanting her back. I went back to work when Debbie was 6 weeks old and this time I worked at KFC in Springvale and did all the odd shifts so that I could have ther most time with Debbie. Bob worked full time and while I had been not working had taken up a second job at Southside Six. He dropped that job as soon as I went back to work so he could take care of Debbie at nights. I always bought him his two free pieces of chicken and potato and gravy.
We were happy as we could be with not much money and a baby.
I was a child when i first met Bob. I was 16, brainy, nerdy, attractive enough in my own way. My fiance Nev once said of me, ( I met him when I was 42 and divorced, he was just a pup of 30 )
I got better looking as I got older, losing the puppy fat and turning fiercer as I got older and especially after Lauren died. And being divorced from Bob.
But when we were first married, after our disastrous honeymoon, we were waiting on our first baby being born and we were very happy and very much in love. I was on the farm when Bob first asked me to join him in the bath. We were engaged then and had had our engagement party in the hay shed. Bathing together became a habit of ours for many years. Bob would always call out to me "Nette Nette" and I would have to stop whatever I was doing and join him in the bath. Then we would play stupid silly sexy games, but we thought they were fun.
He would also come and get me when I was heavily pregnant and after Debbie was born, with the truck from Otter Fencing and grab me and we would go on adventures to wherever he had to deliver goods.
Cat Stevens and Kris Kristofferson tunes playing in the background. we were young and in love and we were invincible against the world. We lived in a flat in Murrumbeena in the first year of our marriage. An upstairs flat. My brother George boarded with us and he was easy company. His board money bought our food every week. And all these years later, George can still not look at sausage mince. After I had Debbie I used to walk to Permewans in Murrumbeena and do the weekly grocery shop, butchers last, for mainly sausage meat. And my one treat a week was a plain hamburger and a can of coke, costing me all up 23 c.
Bob and I had a great love life in those days, he was not as affectionate as I was, nor as demonstrative as I was, but I figured that would iron itself out down the track. We did all the normal things couples do, going to clubs and the Show and concerts and always there was the farm and Poowong dances with Drake and His Dragons. One time when we were just engaged some drunken louts took a swing out of the window of a car as we exited the Saturday night dance. The iron bar they were waving missed me by inches as they rounded a corner directly in front of us. Lawrie Thomas who was sporting an ingrown toenail dragged me back out of harms way.
We met up with all Bob's cousins in the main street and the males decided these drunken yahoos, must be stopped. Bob was always called Oscar in those day, especially by his cousins, and the reason for the name was that when younger had sported a hairstyle like Oscar Hammerstein. So Oscar and the "boys" were going on the trail of the drunken yahoos and we girls were going too. Just then the hapless drunks came back into town and did a slow circle of the main car park square and took of with a loud screech of tires and a spurt of gravel
So there were about 5 cars, of us, Ken Salmon, Graeme Hancock, Robin Hancock, (Same name as Bob, Robin Hancock ) and we were off in screech of wheels as well and in hot pursuit of the fast offenders. we went for miles and miles and just when we had about enough, the drunks came to a dead end. They jumped out od their cars and ran out into the paddocks. Their eyes blinded by our headlights, two of them ran straight for us. So all the boys hopped out and beat the shit out of them. Bob was the most savage and kept pounding away at this one guy, and just would not stop. The other boys had to pull him off the young kid.
There was much rejoicing in the car on the way home. George had hit someone too and although not one to punch people, he was young, male and aggressive, that 19 year old bravado, when the blood sings in your ears and crossing over to be adult male usually requires, some sort of pain from injury. We were a merry lot, young looking for kicks in an otherwise dull town, Bob was clearly an Alpha Male with a loud voice that brooked no argument. he was in his element with his "boys" but had begun to show signs of being emotionally cold.
We kept the relationship hidden pretty much from his dad. He pulled me aside at one stage and said,
You're not thinking of going out with that Bastard, are you ?"
I looked at him, how had he guessed what was going through my mind ??
I asked him why not,
"Because he a shit, he was arrested by the cops at Matthew Flinders Hotel and tried to knock out the cop when the cop said
"What's your name, Whiskers?"
"Not fucking whiskers", Bob replied and duly was locked up in the back of the divvie wagon, where he kicked and carried on, so the police gave him a flogging back at the station for good measure.
"I'm not going out with him", I firmly replied.
I didn't want to lose his Father Tiny's respect. I adored him and he was so good to me. He was a substitute for my Dad, who I missed.
We were married in Sydney about a year after that conversation and Tiny would not come to the wedding and wouldn't talk to me for ages. Not until I had Debbie and then he was the same as before. He loved the baby and made allowances for our being together, but I could tell he never really approved. So once we were married and "legal" as a couple we were able to be ourselves a lot more.
Bob took me, 8 months pregnant and George to see Zabriskie Point at the Oakleigh drive in. It was the first movie that said the word fuck and it was a big deal in those innocent days. You had to be 18 to enter.
The attendant was silly enough to ask Bob.
"How old is your girlfriend?"
Bob snorted and without turning his head said,
"She's not my fucking girlfriend, she's my wife"
I was in my bathrobe, mindst you, nothing else fitted and it made for an interesting outfit as I made numerous trips to the toilet.
The movie was not much, a man wrote the word FUCK in the sand and the rest was fairly ordinary and we 3 had a hard time understanding any of it. Bob loved CLOCKWORK ORANGE, I hated it. He liked the violence and nudity. It was a rude movie for those days and had originated in Britain, a fact I was inordinately proud of. but I still hated it and I can't watch it now. I can't watch "Sleepimg With The Enemy " either. Urgh, a shiver goes through me at that Movie, too close to life.
But mainly we were happy when first married. We went out with friends, drank, played cards, watched telly, went to the farm most weekends. we liked to be at home as well. we all got along pretty well and met George's girlfriend Karin and his best friend, Ivan Muncin. (Strangely enough I am still friends with both of them now ). We had other mutual friends as well and Bob's sister Pauline and her boyfriend, Ross, who had met up at our wedding. It was momentous when Debbie was born, we both adored her and took her every where with us. In that way Bob was good, he loved babies, having younger siblings, who he teased mostly and made fun of.
They were adorable his younger siblings. Ivan a white haired boy of 9, who was the greatest little shyster when it came to asking for things. Well, not asking, hinting. I worked in Myers when 16 in Childrens Books (apt) and brought home toys for Ivan and Kerrie. A whole set of hot wheels, for Ivan, the track, the cars, the lot. Ivan loved it but soon began hinting for more cars, I just laughed at his boldness. he was so cute as was Kerrie with her fierceness and toughness and her cute lisp. They were wonderful kids and I treated them as if they were my siblings.
I had Debbie on November 25th, an incredibly hot day. She was squished a bit but otherwise perfect and had a tan. The first morning they brought the baby for a feed, I rang the buzzer as soon as the Nurse had exited the room.
"This is not my baby" I said to her.
She looked at me in that way some nurses have perfected, the silly new Mummy face.
"Of course, it's your baby Mrs Hancock"
"My baby has a tanned face, this baby is pink and white"
She grabbed up the baby and unwrapped her on the bed. She took a look at the babies wristband and looked at me in some alarm.
"oops sorry, Mrs Hancock, my apologies, this is not your baby.
The ladies at Otters told me how proud Bob was of his new baby,He kept saying in wonderment they told me.
"it's a girl, a girl, We thought we were having a boy"
These were tender words coming out of the rough gate welder who looked like Ned Kelly. Bob in those days sported a beard and mo and did for years. The ladies at work were in awe of him and left him alone until he and I had the baby and then he was all smiles.
Bob literally adored Debbie and we were such young 18 ans 24 parents and so protective of her. We never let any one mind her until she was 8 months old and then we were at the baby sitters doorstep at 7am the next morning, missing her and wanting her back. I went back to work when Debbie was 6 weeks old and this time I worked at KFC in Springvale and did all the odd shifts so that I could have ther most time with Debbie. Bob worked full time and while I had been not working had taken up a second job at Southside Six. He dropped that job as soon as I went back to work so he could take care of Debbie at nights. I always bought him his two free pieces of chicken and potato and gravy.
We were happy as we could be with not much money and a baby.
