The Journey to Here and Now
Without Prejudice
Writing the blogs has been therapy for me and I feel so much better that its finished. The journey from there to here. I began as a shy bookish young girl who married and had kids and now am out the other side and back to the me that was before. Just Janette.
I didn't know evil when I was a child, I was protected and cossetted and although I didn't know a lot then about practical skills, I do now. I am going through a second child hood and it feels fantastic. By writing the stories and letting out the past and things I hadn't spoken of weight that I had accrued just shed off my body like stripping off wallpaper. I now weigh less than I have in 30 years, and I love it.
Being able to try on off the rack clothes is brilliant and I have all this energy I have to burn. I'm proud of my kids, they are all doing well. I'm proud of them and their kids and their achievements. After losing a sister they could have gone the way of many other kids in Keysborough in the 80's, dead, drugs, alcohol, crime, but they didn't. I'm so glad they hung on and made good lives even when things were falling down around them.
Laurens death, the divorce which was horrendous as all divorces are, they had to contend with. But they made it through to being great women with great lives and terrific kids. I became the single Mother from hell with them for years, was strict, demanding, over anxious and made plenty of mistakes and failed more times thatn I can remember.
They put up with me too. I am so glad they didn't give up on me.
I feel energised and optimistic about writing the stories. There is one button you can push on Google and I could delete the lot and they would all disappear in to the ether, but I don't. I don't mind laying my life bare as it was already bare before it just hadn't been written down, nor was it correct.
I am a terribly shy person, I always have been. No one would know it as I can appear confident and tough but I'm not. I love peace and harmony and I love it too if everyone just gets along. With people that cause noise and confusion I just don't spend time with. Only if they are family and even then I would make visits short.
I just don't see the point hanging around with negative people or bullies, violent people or bores. I know Desiderata says spend time with the dull they too have their story but as far as I'm concerned at this age and having been through what I have been through I haven't the time for the dull.
I know I said I wasn't going anywhere near the light of love again, no more being burnt by the flame. But I am. He's a lot younger than me, spiritual, sweet, God know where it is heading but for now its ok. He's just plain old fashioned fun. I like him he likes me and we will see. At the very least I have this wonderful new body and I am making the most of that and working as hard as I can.
Thank you all so much for reading my stories. I hate to read them back as I have poured tears and laughters and songs into them. Harsh things and great things and after all it's just a life and my girls will one day read them and understand me, as will my grandkids and great grandkids. My words, my legacy to just an ordinary life.
I wish you all love, just love, as you can't take anything else with you. I have everything I have ever wanted, loved some remarkable men, have some incredible friends, best girls in the world and what can I say about my Grandkids, except, yum .
So I am going to be doing something else with my life for a while, something practical which I also love and so I sign off for now, with love Janette
Writing the blogs has been therapy for me and I feel so much better that its finished. The journey from there to here. I began as a shy bookish young girl who married and had kids and now am out the other side and back to the me that was before. Just Janette.
I didn't know evil when I was a child, I was protected and cossetted and although I didn't know a lot then about practical skills, I do now. I am going through a second child hood and it feels fantastic. By writing the stories and letting out the past and things I hadn't spoken of weight that I had accrued just shed off my body like stripping off wallpaper. I now weigh less than I have in 30 years, and I love it.
Being able to try on off the rack clothes is brilliant and I have all this energy I have to burn. I'm proud of my kids, they are all doing well. I'm proud of them and their kids and their achievements. After losing a sister they could have gone the way of many other kids in Keysborough in the 80's, dead, drugs, alcohol, crime, but they didn't. I'm so glad they hung on and made good lives even when things were falling down around them.
Laurens death, the divorce which was horrendous as all divorces are, they had to contend with. But they made it through to being great women with great lives and terrific kids. I became the single Mother from hell with them for years, was strict, demanding, over anxious and made plenty of mistakes and failed more times thatn I can remember.
They put up with me too. I am so glad they didn't give up on me.
I feel energised and optimistic about writing the stories. There is one button you can push on Google and I could delete the lot and they would all disappear in to the ether, but I don't. I don't mind laying my life bare as it was already bare before it just hadn't been written down, nor was it correct.
I am a terribly shy person, I always have been. No one would know it as I can appear confident and tough but I'm not. I love peace and harmony and I love it too if everyone just gets along. With people that cause noise and confusion I just don't spend time with. Only if they are family and even then I would make visits short.
I just don't see the point hanging around with negative people or bullies, violent people or bores. I know Desiderata says spend time with the dull they too have their story but as far as I'm concerned at this age and having been through what I have been through I haven't the time for the dull.
I know I said I wasn't going anywhere near the light of love again, no more being burnt by the flame. But I am. He's a lot younger than me, spiritual, sweet, God know where it is heading but for now its ok. He's just plain old fashioned fun. I like him he likes me and we will see. At the very least I have this wonderful new body and I am making the most of that and working as hard as I can.
Thank you all so much for reading my stories. I hate to read them back as I have poured tears and laughters and songs into them. Harsh things and great things and after all it's just a life and my girls will one day read them and understand me, as will my grandkids and great grandkids. My words, my legacy to just an ordinary life.
I wish you all love, just love, as you can't take anything else with you. I have everything I have ever wanted, loved some remarkable men, have some incredible friends, best girls in the world and what can I say about my Grandkids, except, yum .
So I am going to be doing something else with my life for a while, something practical which I also love and so I sign off for now, with love Janette
