Secret Womens Business----Men
Without Prejudice
Since I divorced I have always had younger men in my life. Always interesting or fun or characters or handsome but always younger and always good looking. I have no idea why and hopefully my counsellor can it explain it to me. But I have a problem with all men and that is why I am seeing a counsellor, now. My secret Womens Business is that up to now and for ever before I don't like men that much.
I don't like women if thats what you are thinking but up to now I have paid out on men to an extreme degree. I call it almost a Black Widow Spider thing. I can make love to them and then I want to despise them, get rid of them, control them. I can't wait for them to leave, do not call them, don't think about them until the next time. Men think I am despicable but they keep coming back.
My counsellor says I have to stop looking for my Dad. Did I hero worship my Dad ? I guess I did. He could play music, spoiled me and never ever even so much as scolded me. He was intelligent and gave me the Birds and Bees talk as my Mother couldn't or wouldn't. He made me laugh, 98 % of the time he was funny and reasonable and I never fought with him as a child. I never ever wanted to disappoint him.
When I am with a man I love him, like him, want to be a clingy child, almost too much. And when I am apart from them I want to destroy them, maim them in some way. I have openly despised quite a few and absolutely wished some of them dead.
But I am going to see a counsellor to break this bad habit. I just have the attitude that women are better off without them as mine always seem to cost me time, money or are bad tempered, don't like my Music or some other "Crime"
I think also that most men are unfaithful and my brothers and Grandson back me up on this/ Also my male friends/ They don't see it as being unfaithful. The french men have it their way where they can have wife and Mistress too and its allowable. The wife almost welcomes it as she doesn't have to fuss about where her man is all the time.
I hate infidelity and I hate hurt and I hate that kids get caught up in the mix and it is mainly because men can't keep it zipped up. Its a dick thing, so Eddie Murphy tells us in RAW and my Grandson tells me in real life and so do my brothers. men are "dirty" a call girl says and she has had phone sex with at least 3,500 men and she said it turns her off men altogether.
So where does that leave us ?
How can you be the person you want and try hard to be loyal, forgiving and "In Love" and pander to a mans ego and he is more than likely to cheat on you. I am so anal I can't turn a blind eye to certain things as in
"Before you marry keep your eyes wide open and after you marry keep them half shut"
Its a conundrum.
I ralise men are more sexual than women and by nature are selfish. And I know great decent men that still cheat on their wives. Giving the excuse that men need Variety, that you can have steak at home every night but still want chicken sometimes. I just don't buy that. I think that is a feeble excuse for bad selfish behaviour. If I was seeing two people I would tell both. And if I was shagging someone else behind my hubbies, partners back I would leave him first and then find myself first and then look for another person.
I wasn't always like that but I am now. I expect the best and think I deserve it. I see so many women that are abused and hurt and kids that have to go begging. I see too much of the other side and betrayal almost destroys the person it is perpetrated against. I now hate decption and lies and either keep it zipped up or don't enter into a long term thing. Some men are just lone wolves. Some men should never marry. Some men have low self esteem and they cheat because of it. Some men don't consider oral sex as cheating.
They say "All men think they are Gods" but they often have feet of clay.
I realise as I was growing up , now that I am looking back, That my Dad was not the faithful kind. He cheated on my Mum and yet loved her more than anyone. He stayed with her even when she was clearly nuts and never going to get better. Towards the end she was violent and lashed out at loved ones but he never gave up on her. Wouldn't give up on her but remarried 18 months after my Mum died and my siblings were horrified.
I have a fiend whose Dad remarried 6 weeks after his beloved wife of 30 years died painfully from cancer. A woman would grieve for years before getting in to something else if at all. But a man will replace. I guess that is his way of thinking. He can't bring her back. But some of the worst cases I ever see and know of are men who continue to pine for their wife if she has left them for someone else.
I have known two men whose girlfriends found someone else while the men were away fighting wars and never ever had another woman for the rest of their lives. The once bitten twice shy syndrome taken to the nth degree. I know men who will carry that hurt to the grave with them. A woman won't. She will in time find someone else but a lot of women whether they were happily married or not will not take on another man.
My Auntie Pat always said.
"I have done for one man all my life and I will not DO for another"
My Aunts generation were down trodden women, who were expected to do as they were told. I know the world no longer expects the traditional role for females. Girls can have it all these days, financial independence, travel, great dwellings, new cars, promotions but there is still a feeling I get from the young females that surround me. They are not complete without a Man by their side.
To be continued
no
Since I divorced I have always had younger men in my life. Always interesting or fun or characters or handsome but always younger and always good looking. I have no idea why and hopefully my counsellor can it explain it to me. But I have a problem with all men and that is why I am seeing a counsellor, now. My secret Womens Business is that up to now and for ever before I don't like men that much.
I don't like women if thats what you are thinking but up to now I have paid out on men to an extreme degree. I call it almost a Black Widow Spider thing. I can make love to them and then I want to despise them, get rid of them, control them. I can't wait for them to leave, do not call them, don't think about them until the next time. Men think I am despicable but they keep coming back.
My counsellor says I have to stop looking for my Dad. Did I hero worship my Dad ? I guess I did. He could play music, spoiled me and never ever even so much as scolded me. He was intelligent and gave me the Birds and Bees talk as my Mother couldn't or wouldn't. He made me laugh, 98 % of the time he was funny and reasonable and I never fought with him as a child. I never ever wanted to disappoint him.
When I am with a man I love him, like him, want to be a clingy child, almost too much. And when I am apart from them I want to destroy them, maim them in some way. I have openly despised quite a few and absolutely wished some of them dead.
But I am going to see a counsellor to break this bad habit. I just have the attitude that women are better off without them as mine always seem to cost me time, money or are bad tempered, don't like my Music or some other "Crime"
I think also that most men are unfaithful and my brothers and Grandson back me up on this/ Also my male friends/ They don't see it as being unfaithful. The french men have it their way where they can have wife and Mistress too and its allowable. The wife almost welcomes it as she doesn't have to fuss about where her man is all the time.
I hate infidelity and I hate hurt and I hate that kids get caught up in the mix and it is mainly because men can't keep it zipped up. Its a dick thing, so Eddie Murphy tells us in RAW and my Grandson tells me in real life and so do my brothers. men are "dirty" a call girl says and she has had phone sex with at least 3,500 men and she said it turns her off men altogether.
So where does that leave us ?
How can you be the person you want and try hard to be loyal, forgiving and "In Love" and pander to a mans ego and he is more than likely to cheat on you. I am so anal I can't turn a blind eye to certain things as in
"Before you marry keep your eyes wide open and after you marry keep them half shut"
Its a conundrum.
I ralise men are more sexual than women and by nature are selfish. And I know great decent men that still cheat on their wives. Giving the excuse that men need Variety, that you can have steak at home every night but still want chicken sometimes. I just don't buy that. I think that is a feeble excuse for bad selfish behaviour. If I was seeing two people I would tell both. And if I was shagging someone else behind my hubbies, partners back I would leave him first and then find myself first and then look for another person.
I wasn't always like that but I am now. I expect the best and think I deserve it. I see so many women that are abused and hurt and kids that have to go begging. I see too much of the other side and betrayal almost destroys the person it is perpetrated against. I now hate decption and lies and either keep it zipped up or don't enter into a long term thing. Some men are just lone wolves. Some men should never marry. Some men have low self esteem and they cheat because of it. Some men don't consider oral sex as cheating.
They say "All men think they are Gods" but they often have feet of clay.
I realise as I was growing up , now that I am looking back, That my Dad was not the faithful kind. He cheated on my Mum and yet loved her more than anyone. He stayed with her even when she was clearly nuts and never going to get better. Towards the end she was violent and lashed out at loved ones but he never gave up on her. Wouldn't give up on her but remarried 18 months after my Mum died and my siblings were horrified.
I have a fiend whose Dad remarried 6 weeks after his beloved wife of 30 years died painfully from cancer. A woman would grieve for years before getting in to something else if at all. But a man will replace. I guess that is his way of thinking. He can't bring her back. But some of the worst cases I ever see and know of are men who continue to pine for their wife if she has left them for someone else.
I have known two men whose girlfriends found someone else while the men were away fighting wars and never ever had another woman for the rest of their lives. The once bitten twice shy syndrome taken to the nth degree. I know men who will carry that hurt to the grave with them. A woman won't. She will in time find someone else but a lot of women whether they were happily married or not will not take on another man.
My Auntie Pat always said.
"I have done for one man all my life and I will not DO for another"
My Aunts generation were down trodden women, who were expected to do as they were told. I know the world no longer expects the traditional role for females. Girls can have it all these days, financial independence, travel, great dwellings, new cars, promotions but there is still a feeling I get from the young females that surround me. They are not complete without a Man by their side.
To be continued
no
