Skinny Girls Club--Tips And Tricks 5
Without Prejudice
The Ellenis
Me today
I ran around the local Coles Supermarket tonight, grabbing grapes and veggies. Two of the men that work there joked and laughed with me, one young, one old. Both of them I have seen many times since the new Coles opened and they are always up for a laugh and a chat. They tell me what's good and fresh and talk to me of other things. My good friend thinks I can pick up a man wherever I go and has asked me how I do it. Its easy I say because I am not interested in them.
And it is, just that, easy.
For years I was invisible and even then if a man did approach me I would shy away. One either because I had my old fat body back then and didn't feel attractive anyway or two I would wonder what they wanted from me. Now I am older and just don't care, men are back in my life with a vengeance and to tell you the truth I don't want any of them. They bother me, annoy me, unless they are young like Zach and I have something to teach them.
They try and impress me with their swagger, or realising I am intelligent try to match me in wit and conversation. I am not being mean, here, I am just smart enough to know that if they have nothing to offer me I am just not interested. I am like a man in that way. My brothers said I have always been the same. A competitor, ambitious, and no time for nonsense. Even as a little girl I was more interested in beating boys at tests than I was in kissing them.
Oh, don't worry I have always liked boys right from little, never, ever fancied girls, but I just see them now I am older as mainly inferior to me, to women. I have been through the broken heart times as any female does. But only when I was relying on them for something. Money or time.
And they have cost me dearly in both, so now I eye them with a healthy disregard and it works so much better. And I always thought if I did ever get a rocking body back, which at the time I thought was impossible, I would treat them with disdain, as they didn't want me when I was fat.
Well, two did, but I thought they were mad. Who wants a 84 kg woman who stands only 5' 2" ?
Now I am 58 kg and probably shrinking in height I feel like I can manage on my own. And to be fair to them, am so complex, I wouldn't wish me on my worst enemy. I want so many things. Double my readership per day, convert the first 100 of my favourite stories to word, write more than the eight hundred I have. 1001, is my goal. As in 1001 Arabian Nights.
I want to learn Italian, so at least when I go there I can be understood, improve my Spanish, travel to New York for the shops, at Christmas. And once again swim in the green blue seas of New Caledonia. I want to go to Cabo as well and perhaps Mexico but not sure if I could take the heat. Travelling overseas in a seat in a closet , which is what an airline seat feels like to me, is enough to make me break out in a sweat, even now.
I would love to sail there but I am sure the reverse is true of years ago, it's now more expensive to sail than fly than it was when my family and I returned to the U.K. On the Greek Liner, The Ellenis when I was 12, pretending to be 11, so my fare was reduced by half. Or when we returned 4 years later, when I was 16 and met my first "real boyfriend" on board. An older man of 21. And I met him when my brother and I jumped off the entertainment deck of the Southern Cross, fully clothed, into the clear waters of Tahiti.
The thing I remember the most apart from meeting Derek as we swam to the dock after jumping as a dare, was how far it was down and the pain all over as we plummeted into the water like bullets from a gun. The crash and the descent and the noise was incredible. I can remember half way down feeling slightly panicked and a bit nauseated. This was not the high tower at the diving pool at Liverpool baths, where my brothers and sister would jump off, over and over all day in Summer.
Miraculously we didn't get caught and ticked off by the Staff on the ship. I thought that was why Derek was there sat on the side of the dock as he was, watching my brother and I. I knew he was from the ship and looked like one of the Officers. He called me over and surprisingly asked if he could take me to lunch and I like any gauche English schoolgirl I stammered that he would have to ask my parents or I would have to take my brother with me at least.
Oh, those days. I laugh now when I think about my innocence. A Mother that never, ever spoke about such matters as boys and kissing and sex. And my poor Dad having to give me the birds and bees chat while I squirmed with embarrassment at 13 as I was developing at the rate of knots in the U.K. I admire his bravery now.
I have learned a lot since those days. And gave my two oldest daughters the same speech when they were 11 and 12 and the second oldest sat the whole time with her hands over her ears, singing la la la. she now is the Mother of seven boys, maybe she should have uncovered her ears.!
Love Janette
The Ellenis
I ran around the local Coles Supermarket tonight, grabbing grapes and veggies. Two of the men that work there joked and laughed with me, one young, one old. Both of them I have seen many times since the new Coles opened and they are always up for a laugh and a chat. They tell me what's good and fresh and talk to me of other things. My good friend thinks I can pick up a man wherever I go and has asked me how I do it. Its easy I say because I am not interested in them.
And it is, just that, easy.
For years I was invisible and even then if a man did approach me I would shy away. One either because I had my old fat body back then and didn't feel attractive anyway or two I would wonder what they wanted from me. Now I am older and just don't care, men are back in my life with a vengeance and to tell you the truth I don't want any of them. They bother me, annoy me, unless they are young like Zach and I have something to teach them.
They try and impress me with their swagger, or realising I am intelligent try to match me in wit and conversation. I am not being mean, here, I am just smart enough to know that if they have nothing to offer me I am just not interested. I am like a man in that way. My brothers said I have always been the same. A competitor, ambitious, and no time for nonsense. Even as a little girl I was more interested in beating boys at tests than I was in kissing them.
Oh, don't worry I have always liked boys right from little, never, ever fancied girls, but I just see them now I am older as mainly inferior to me, to women. I have been through the broken heart times as any female does. But only when I was relying on them for something. Money or time.
And they have cost me dearly in both, so now I eye them with a healthy disregard and it works so much better. And I always thought if I did ever get a rocking body back, which at the time I thought was impossible, I would treat them with disdain, as they didn't want me when I was fat.
Well, two did, but I thought they were mad. Who wants a 84 kg woman who stands only 5' 2" ?
Now I am 58 kg and probably shrinking in height I feel like I can manage on my own. And to be fair to them, am so complex, I wouldn't wish me on my worst enemy. I want so many things. Double my readership per day, convert the first 100 of my favourite stories to word, write more than the eight hundred I have. 1001, is my goal. As in 1001 Arabian Nights.
I want to learn Italian, so at least when I go there I can be understood, improve my Spanish, travel to New York for the shops, at Christmas. And once again swim in the green blue seas of New Caledonia. I want to go to Cabo as well and perhaps Mexico but not sure if I could take the heat. Travelling overseas in a seat in a closet , which is what an airline seat feels like to me, is enough to make me break out in a sweat, even now.
I would love to sail there but I am sure the reverse is true of years ago, it's now more expensive to sail than fly than it was when my family and I returned to the U.K. On the Greek Liner, The Ellenis when I was 12, pretending to be 11, so my fare was reduced by half. Or when we returned 4 years later, when I was 16 and met my first "real boyfriend" on board. An older man of 21. And I met him when my brother and I jumped off the entertainment deck of the Southern Cross, fully clothed, into the clear waters of Tahiti.
The thing I remember the most apart from meeting Derek as we swam to the dock after jumping as a dare, was how far it was down and the pain all over as we plummeted into the water like bullets from a gun. The crash and the descent and the noise was incredible. I can remember half way down feeling slightly panicked and a bit nauseated. This was not the high tower at the diving pool at Liverpool baths, where my brothers and sister would jump off, over and over all day in Summer.
Miraculously we didn't get caught and ticked off by the Staff on the ship. I thought that was why Derek was there sat on the side of the dock as he was, watching my brother and I. I knew he was from the ship and looked like one of the Officers. He called me over and surprisingly asked if he could take me to lunch and I like any gauche English schoolgirl I stammered that he would have to ask my parents or I would have to take my brother with me at least.
Oh, those days. I laugh now when I think about my innocence. A Mother that never, ever spoke about such matters as boys and kissing and sex. And my poor Dad having to give me the birds and bees chat while I squirmed with embarrassment at 13 as I was developing at the rate of knots in the U.K. I admire his bravery now.
I have learned a lot since those days. And gave my two oldest daughters the same speech when they were 11 and 12 and the second oldest sat the whole time with her hands over her ears, singing la la la. she now is the Mother of seven boys, maybe she should have uncovered her ears.!
Love Janette
