Living Dangerously, Underground, and Nelson Mandela
Without Prejudice
I saw an old Movie, Friday, I was half listening to a report about Nelson Mandela's health, not good. I felt sad for the man that spent so long in jail for a cause he believed in. So many vital years of life, gone and never coming back.
The Movie was called Going Underground, obviously based on a true story and was about the real cost of Domestic Violence. I didn't want to watch it at first, too close to home, too real, too confronting. But I did, I was mesmerised after a while. I couldn't believe what happened to the woman in the movie, losing custody of her kids. Her kids questions and horror at what their Mother went through and why.
Joanna Kerns from Growing Pains played the Mother, what an entirely different unglamorous role for her.
The Movie has two names, Shameful Secrets and Going Underground.
It has some of the most realistic scenes I have ever seen of Domestic Violence. The poor actor that played the husband probably never had work in Hollywood again.
The Synopsis.
I saw an old Movie, Friday, I was half listening to a report about Nelson Mandela's health, not good. I felt sad for the man that spent so long in jail for a cause he believed in. So many vital years of life, gone and never coming back.
The Movie was called Going Underground, obviously based on a true story and was about the real cost of Domestic Violence. I didn't want to watch it at first, too close to home, too real, too confronting. But I did, I was mesmerised after a while. I couldn't believe what happened to the woman in the movie, losing custody of her kids. Her kids questions and horror at what their Mother went through and why.
Joanna Kerns from Growing Pains played the Mother, what an entirely different unglamorous role for her.
The Movie has two names, Shameful Secrets and Going Underground.
It has some of the most realistic scenes I have ever seen of Domestic Violence. The poor actor that played the husband probably never had work in Hollywood again.
The Synopsis.
Behind the facade of a perfect suburban life lies a secret and insufferable nightmare: a woman and her children are subjected to their father's unpredictable temper and violent outbursts. Fearing for their safety and perhaps their lives, the frightened mother and her children make their daring escape, assuming new identities and going underground to hide from their tormentor. However, the family's refuge from danger is only temporary...in order to be truly free from fear, they must bravely come out of the shadows and confront their enemy face to face.
The Movie answers a lot of questions about why women, stay. Shame, embarrassment, fear for their kids, thinking they dont deserve better, poor self confidence. And as they are never sure what will trigger the violence, they become trapped and suffer a syndrome called, " Learned Helplessness ". It was truly disgustingly sad to watch. And it made me angry. I had been there 23 years ago, a beaten down trodden wife.
He threatened to kill me, kill the kids, hurt the kids, hurt my family or hurt Himself. At heart they are bullies but the knowledge of that does not make it any less dangerous. It is very dangerous. I have no idea what makes them violent to their female partners. Some emotional torment going on in their brains. The main character leaves when the violent husband attacks his Son, giving him a black eye. The sins of the Father, visited on the Son.
By that time she has lost full time custody of the children. It was made in 1993, 20 years ago, and have things changed that much as we move into the oughties.? No, they haven't. Only 3% of domestic violence cases are reported. I knew of a judge once that ran a knife over his wife's arm while they were both in the kitchen, cutting her. They had a dinner party in the other room in full swing. The Judge did it in silence, angry for some reason at his wives behaviour. She had to say it was an accident.
Who was going to believe her.?
A Judge after all. Same as Policemen, they know where the Shelters are, someone told me The Police are the worst.
