Budget Family Living
Without Prejudice
My daughter can stretch a dollar like no one I know. She has seven boys and a Ministry house and had a partner for twenty years who had drug issues. He loved to take her debit card and she had five boys to him. Most of his lfe was spent in the "Big House" but each and every time would promise to get clean and fly straight. He never did.
When things were bad she learned to hide money and debit card in her socks and wear them to bed. She would store up food and feed the boys when he had passed out. Only someone in love with a junkie would know what that sort of life can be like.
I pretty much left her alone to sort her own life out and one Christmas day called in to see her, she was feeding the boys hot dogs for Christmas Dinner. Shortly after that she rang me and said to come and get her and we began a journey together out of the nightmare. I am happy to say she is now well, has permanent housing for life and so do I.
I had no regard for money at the time. I had lost a daughter and would have gladly given every cent I had away, to me money meant death and disaster. My brother died when I was 5 and my parents were doing so well before that. Before my daughter died my ex husband and I were the same. So I came to associate money with pain. I ended up paying private rent after having several houses.
Three years ago I decided to have a unit put in Yvette's back yard and have finally settled down with love and kids and family. She and I have never been happier. She has backup with me and I have family that I was craving for. Plus I get my privacy to write and think.
I have learned more from Yvette than she has from me, I am sure. After all the poor years she can't change her thrift now and I will pass on the tips to you.
You do not need a lot for kids to have a good life.
In fact less is more.
All of Yvette's boys aged, 23,18,16,14,8,4,2 are polite shy boys who neither smoke, drink, do drugs or swear and cuss at their Mother. She decided to keep them away from negative influences,vets their friends and keeps them happy indoors a lot of the time. She has no truck with boys hanging out at Shopping Centres and causing trouble.
She shops well, they all eat well and are all skinny, tall and brainy. She didn't make it past year 10 and yet three of her boys are top of their class in maths. And with two of them Jai and Brock aged 14 and 16 respectively you can have a conversation about most subjects almost as if you are talking to a 50 year old. They understand their Dad's problems but they are so used to him not being around its like he is a ghost. They love and ignore him in equal measure.
We fought and fought to get her permanently house as the boys needed it and she has been here almosy 8 years and without cheap housing, as she says she would be "stuffed".
She buys food once a week and buys all the essentials. Milk in bulk, bread in bulk,fruit and vegetables, tinned food, meat. She buys in cash and spends a set amount. If she gets me to grab something for her from the shops she knows the cost to the last cent and counts it out into my hand.
She gives the boys takeaway once a week and they are aware of this and look forward to it. She hardly ever buys clothes as she is a hoarder and is proud of the fact that clothes have passed from the oldest one to the youngest now. I was going to frame one pair of Toy Story boxers after I mended them. She knows where everything is in her house and delights me by finding a missing piece of a toy or clothing.
A wealthy man said to me recently that he made a big mistake with his kids and when I asked what it was he said he gave them everything. These boys never get everything. They wait for birthdays, they wait for Christmas. They put up with little to get a lot.
She invested in Foxtel for the winter months so her boys could never say they were bored and the older ones watch all the war and history, nature documentaries. The 18 year old is a neat, lover of movies and has over 800 in his collection. All labelled and lined up and he knows if one is missing. He likes the classics and yesterday I saw someone had given him The Good The Bad And The Ugly.
The 14 year old is addicted to the series Games Of Thrones and like my older brother went into depression when the last series ended and the new one doesn't start till 2013. Once they escaped their old life Yvette and I found movies that inspired them. Tarzan, Iron Giant, movies with dinosaurs, kights, heroism and fun. All of them love the clip from the Tarzan animated movie where Tarzan skates down the tree and cam sing the song Son Of Man by Phil Collins word for word.
Fo Christmas this year Yvette bought them all Slip and Slide and a small pool. The big boys have as much fun as the little ones and once again she is keeping them at home. She loves her boys home so she can see what they are up to and its not expensive.
She invested in computers for them so they don't feel left out of the teen world but she vets with a ruth;essness as to what they watch. No porn, no extreme violence, no violence against women. She expects them to respect her and if they didn't she would foot them up the bum and though tiny they are all scared to death of her.
She throws nothing away. She recycles everything. They get what they are given and they like it. Or else. She's a tough Mother and thinks of herself ss Ma Barker and her sons without the robberies or guns. She is honest as the day is long. She tells them the truth about her past and their Fathers past. As a life lesson. She trusts no one.
But she is about to marry the Father of the two youngest boys on February 14th. She won't be spending a fortune on it. She has a Dad but can't rely on him to pay for it. It will be by a celebrant or registry office and a party after. Her Mother in Law to be is paying for a hineymoon for them as that is more important, Yvette feels, no kids allowed, just rest and relaxation. Bet she misses the kids.
Kyle the oldest works full time and drives an Audi, Zach is 18, neat, gentlemanly and a rock. He wants to be a Policeman and there would be none better. Brock is 16 a model and wants to be a chef and starts a course next year. Jai is a genius and an army cadet and loves it. He always wanted to be either an accountant or a family man. His wife will never work he says and will look after him. Kyan is 8 and loves gardening, Acer 4 loves watching builders and Cruz aged 2 is a happy Budda of love and delight, he is also fascinated with tools.
Kids do not need a lot to survive. These boys have survived things that would make your hair stand on end. But cheap permanent housing has saved them from a terrible life of moving and insecurity. Saved me too. I reside as the Queens Mother who knows all, sees all and has all. I have the education to help them with essays on To Kill A Mockingbird or Of Mice and Men. I can cut it down into manageable chunks and explain it in a paragraph.
I can help with maths too and history as the boys favourite subject is the 2nd world war and both my parents served in it. I have the liniments and ointments and healthy tips that they need. And it would be rare that I didn't have something, anal little cow that I am. I have learned from Yvette to conserve, recycle. I have three girl friends that can also make a dollar stand on its head. One is a millionairess. Its a habit that she can't shake as she was a poor child with careful parents.
You can learn it however. They don't impulse buy, they expect the best of everything and they dont have that instant satisfaction thing. Obviously they are very high in their self esteem as that helps/ They feel like they deserve the best and are coming from a place of abundant thinking. They concentrate on what they have and not what they are missing.
My daughter can stretch a dollar like no one I know. She has seven boys and a Ministry house and had a partner for twenty years who had drug issues. He loved to take her debit card and she had five boys to him. Most of his lfe was spent in the "Big House" but each and every time would promise to get clean and fly straight. He never did.
When things were bad she learned to hide money and debit card in her socks and wear them to bed. She would store up food and feed the boys when he had passed out. Only someone in love with a junkie would know what that sort of life can be like.
I pretty much left her alone to sort her own life out and one Christmas day called in to see her, she was feeding the boys hot dogs for Christmas Dinner. Shortly after that she rang me and said to come and get her and we began a journey together out of the nightmare. I am happy to say she is now well, has permanent housing for life and so do I.
I had no regard for money at the time. I had lost a daughter and would have gladly given every cent I had away, to me money meant death and disaster. My brother died when I was 5 and my parents were doing so well before that. Before my daughter died my ex husband and I were the same. So I came to associate money with pain. I ended up paying private rent after having several houses.
Three years ago I decided to have a unit put in Yvette's back yard and have finally settled down with love and kids and family. She and I have never been happier. She has backup with me and I have family that I was craving for. Plus I get my privacy to write and think.
I have learned more from Yvette than she has from me, I am sure. After all the poor years she can't change her thrift now and I will pass on the tips to you.
You do not need a lot for kids to have a good life.
In fact less is more.
All of Yvette's boys aged, 23,18,16,14,8,4,2 are polite shy boys who neither smoke, drink, do drugs or swear and cuss at their Mother. She decided to keep them away from negative influences,vets their friends and keeps them happy indoors a lot of the time. She has no truck with boys hanging out at Shopping Centres and causing trouble.
She shops well, they all eat well and are all skinny, tall and brainy. She didn't make it past year 10 and yet three of her boys are top of their class in maths. And with two of them Jai and Brock aged 14 and 16 respectively you can have a conversation about most subjects almost as if you are talking to a 50 year old. They understand their Dad's problems but they are so used to him not being around its like he is a ghost. They love and ignore him in equal measure.
We fought and fought to get her permanently house as the boys needed it and she has been here almosy 8 years and without cheap housing, as she says she would be "stuffed".
She buys food once a week and buys all the essentials. Milk in bulk, bread in bulk,fruit and vegetables, tinned food, meat. She buys in cash and spends a set amount. If she gets me to grab something for her from the shops she knows the cost to the last cent and counts it out into my hand.
She gives the boys takeaway once a week and they are aware of this and look forward to it. She hardly ever buys clothes as she is a hoarder and is proud of the fact that clothes have passed from the oldest one to the youngest now. I was going to frame one pair of Toy Story boxers after I mended them. She knows where everything is in her house and delights me by finding a missing piece of a toy or clothing.
A wealthy man said to me recently that he made a big mistake with his kids and when I asked what it was he said he gave them everything. These boys never get everything. They wait for birthdays, they wait for Christmas. They put up with little to get a lot.
She invested in Foxtel for the winter months so her boys could never say they were bored and the older ones watch all the war and history, nature documentaries. The 18 year old is a neat, lover of movies and has over 800 in his collection. All labelled and lined up and he knows if one is missing. He likes the classics and yesterday I saw someone had given him The Good The Bad And The Ugly.
The 14 year old is addicted to the series Games Of Thrones and like my older brother went into depression when the last series ended and the new one doesn't start till 2013. Once they escaped their old life Yvette and I found movies that inspired them. Tarzan, Iron Giant, movies with dinosaurs, kights, heroism and fun. All of them love the clip from the Tarzan animated movie where Tarzan skates down the tree and cam sing the song Son Of Man by Phil Collins word for word.
Fo Christmas this year Yvette bought them all Slip and Slide and a small pool. The big boys have as much fun as the little ones and once again she is keeping them at home. She loves her boys home so she can see what they are up to and its not expensive.
She invested in computers for them so they don't feel left out of the teen world but she vets with a ruth;essness as to what they watch. No porn, no extreme violence, no violence against women. She expects them to respect her and if they didn't she would foot them up the bum and though tiny they are all scared to death of her.
She throws nothing away. She recycles everything. They get what they are given and they like it. Or else. She's a tough Mother and thinks of herself ss Ma Barker and her sons without the robberies or guns. She is honest as the day is long. She tells them the truth about her past and their Fathers past. As a life lesson. She trusts no one.
But she is about to marry the Father of the two youngest boys on February 14th. She won't be spending a fortune on it. She has a Dad but can't rely on him to pay for it. It will be by a celebrant or registry office and a party after. Her Mother in Law to be is paying for a hineymoon for them as that is more important, Yvette feels, no kids allowed, just rest and relaxation. Bet she misses the kids.
Kyle the oldest works full time and drives an Audi, Zach is 18, neat, gentlemanly and a rock. He wants to be a Policeman and there would be none better. Brock is 16 a model and wants to be a chef and starts a course next year. Jai is a genius and an army cadet and loves it. He always wanted to be either an accountant or a family man. His wife will never work he says and will look after him. Kyan is 8 and loves gardening, Acer 4 loves watching builders and Cruz aged 2 is a happy Budda of love and delight, he is also fascinated with tools.
Kids do not need a lot to survive. These boys have survived things that would make your hair stand on end. But cheap permanent housing has saved them from a terrible life of moving and insecurity. Saved me too. I reside as the Queens Mother who knows all, sees all and has all. I have the education to help them with essays on To Kill A Mockingbird or Of Mice and Men. I can cut it down into manageable chunks and explain it in a paragraph.
I can help with maths too and history as the boys favourite subject is the 2nd world war and both my parents served in it. I have the liniments and ointments and healthy tips that they need. And it would be rare that I didn't have something, anal little cow that I am. I have learned from Yvette to conserve, recycle. I have three girl friends that can also make a dollar stand on its head. One is a millionairess. Its a habit that she can't shake as she was a poor child with careful parents.
You can learn it however. They don't impulse buy, they expect the best of everything and they dont have that instant satisfaction thing. Obviously they are very high in their self esteem as that helps/ They feel like they deserve the best and are coming from a place of abundant thinking. They concentrate on what they have and not what they are missing.
