Domestic Violence
Without Prejudice
It's like standing on top of a precipice and being ready to jump. I've never been scared to jump. I used to be but not anymore. I used to listen to too many others, giving them the Power over my life but not anymore, never any more. It has to be about yourself, because if you are well and happy, others will be well and happy too. It's natural. If you are letting someone else in your life tell you how to live what is ultimately your life, you need to stop and listen to your own heart, your own feelings and if necessary take a leap of faith into your own future.
I know you have heard it a million times before but I cannot stress enough how much you need to do this. Others have, usually, their own interests at heart. My Dad always used to say,
"Everyone has their own little axe to grind".
In other words, people can only give you advice from the perspective that they are at, they can't possibly see it from yours.
Remembering that will steer you in the right direction. And yes, the road ahead is not going to be comfortable, it's going to be hard. Expect that, welcome it, but nothing will be as hard as staying where you are. Yes, I agree, it's comfortable and convenient, but
"Comfort and Convenience Is The Kiss Of Death"
And yes, you may think that is a cliche but what isn't ? Hasn't your life up to now been a cliche anyway ??
You may be in a domestic violence situation, my advice, get out, just get out no matter what it takes, it will destroy you and your kids if you have them. Any one that has to bully another person to get what they want, is not a healthy nor loving person and you really do not need them in your life. I wish I had had my advice sooner. I wish I had listened to others and yes, wisdom in hindsight is a fine thing for me to say. But it's right. I had to wait until I was ready and not going to be deterred.
It's like giving up smoking, it doesn't happen until you are ready. But I find in life as in giving up smoking you have to have a plan. The plan is what leads to success and when you are ready everything else will just drop into place.
The first step of any plan begins in the mind. Decide today, right this minute to plan for your life. What is in your life that you want to change ? Write three goals for the next twelve months, even if you don't believe them in your mind.Don't overthink, just make the goals. Write them down as the brain doesn't believe them until you write them down. There is something in the connection between writing them down and them coming to fruition, so write away.
Next hide them away, they are for you and you only to see, not anyone else. Others will try and deter you, say you are not realistic, their would be lots of negatives as 85% of people make negative comments when someone seeks change. Keep them hidden or memorise them, but have them somewhere you can find them in the next twelve months. And put in front of them, "I intend", not "I wish". Intent and wishing are two very different things.
Allow yourself to dream. Imagine your life if the things you want came into being. Imagine yourself driving the luxury car ot looking at your bank balance. Imagine your perfect life whatever that happens to be. look out of the window of your mind and see what is happening. Where are you ? What do you see ? Look down at yourself, what are you wearing ? Look at your body, how does it look ? Look at your face, are you happy? Look inside your heart, are you living your life with a smile on your face ?
Tell yourself that you deserve to be happy, no matter what has gone before. You were that person then, you are this person now. A different person, a more "in control" person. In control of your life, your happiness. Negative doubts will drop away. Surround yourself with happy, optimistic people. I can't sress this enough. Negative people will drain you and pull you backwards. Get rid of negative influences out of your life. I turn the TV off and outside influences off when I write. I have to, I have no choice.
Be calm and relax and tell yourself you deserve this, this goodness and happiness in your life. I write these because I know what you go through and if I can help, just one, I have done my job.
Love Janette
It's like standing on top of a precipice and being ready to jump. I've never been scared to jump. I used to be but not anymore. I used to listen to too many others, giving them the Power over my life but not anymore, never any more. It has to be about yourself, because if you are well and happy, others will be well and happy too. It's natural. If you are letting someone else in your life tell you how to live what is ultimately your life, you need to stop and listen to your own heart, your own feelings and if necessary take a leap of faith into your own future.
I know you have heard it a million times before but I cannot stress enough how much you need to do this. Others have, usually, their own interests at heart. My Dad always used to say,
"Everyone has their own little axe to grind".
In other words, people can only give you advice from the perspective that they are at, they can't possibly see it from yours.
Remembering that will steer you in the right direction. And yes, the road ahead is not going to be comfortable, it's going to be hard. Expect that, welcome it, but nothing will be as hard as staying where you are. Yes, I agree, it's comfortable and convenient, but
"Comfort and Convenience Is The Kiss Of Death"
And yes, you may think that is a cliche but what isn't ? Hasn't your life up to now been a cliche anyway ??
You may be in a domestic violence situation, my advice, get out, just get out no matter what it takes, it will destroy you and your kids if you have them. Any one that has to bully another person to get what they want, is not a healthy nor loving person and you really do not need them in your life. I wish I had had my advice sooner. I wish I had listened to others and yes, wisdom in hindsight is a fine thing for me to say. But it's right. I had to wait until I was ready and not going to be deterred.
It's like giving up smoking, it doesn't happen until you are ready. But I find in life as in giving up smoking you have to have a plan. The plan is what leads to success and when you are ready everything else will just drop into place.
The first step of any plan begins in the mind. Decide today, right this minute to plan for your life. What is in your life that you want to change ? Write three goals for the next twelve months, even if you don't believe them in your mind.Don't overthink, just make the goals. Write them down as the brain doesn't believe them until you write them down. There is something in the connection between writing them down and them coming to fruition, so write away.
Next hide them away, they are for you and you only to see, not anyone else. Others will try and deter you, say you are not realistic, their would be lots of negatives as 85% of people make negative comments when someone seeks change. Keep them hidden or memorise them, but have them somewhere you can find them in the next twelve months. And put in front of them, "I intend", not "I wish". Intent and wishing are two very different things.
Allow yourself to dream. Imagine your life if the things you want came into being. Imagine yourself driving the luxury car ot looking at your bank balance. Imagine your perfect life whatever that happens to be. look out of the window of your mind and see what is happening. Where are you ? What do you see ? Look down at yourself, what are you wearing ? Look at your body, how does it look ? Look at your face, are you happy? Look inside your heart, are you living your life with a smile on your face ?
Tell yourself that you deserve to be happy, no matter what has gone before. You were that person then, you are this person now. A different person, a more "in control" person. In control of your life, your happiness. Negative doubts will drop away. Surround yourself with happy, optimistic people. I can't sress this enough. Negative people will drain you and pull you backwards. Get rid of negative influences out of your life. I turn the TV off and outside influences off when I write. I have to, I have no choice.
Be calm and relax and tell yourself you deserve this, this goodness and happiness in your life. I write these because I know what you go through and if I can help, just one, I have done my job.
Love Janette
