My Crazy as Their Mother, Kids.....
Without Prejudice
My oldest child said this week on Facebook she can't wait for her crazy, skinny arsed Mother to get home. Wonder who she means ? Oh, doh, that would be me. I often don't feel like my girls Mother anymore as they are so grown and I was so young when I had them. Just 24 by the time I had 4. I know 24 year olds that I wouldn't trust with a pet never mind 4 kids.
But that was me and I don't regret it for a second. I am still young enough o dance "The light Fantastic" and my girls are in their 30's and 40's. That is just insane. I have girlfriends younger than my girls. Best bosom buddies and the girlfriends have kids as young as my grand kids. I skipped a generation somewhere, I keep looking around for an eight year old I should still have somewhere stashed away.
I love being a grandma though, as I remember what absolute knock em down, huffy, door slamming stand off Princesses my girls were as teenagers and now they are all going through the same thing, with their kids. Oh the joy.. A mother gets her revenge at last. Mine, being girls, would fight and snitch and bitch and snarl, hit .hiss and beat each other, badly. If I heard,
"She's got my top on",
one more time I would have committed Hari Kari.
That and,
"Mum, do something!!!!!!!!"
I used to wait all day to get in the toilet and then they would stand outside the door,
"Mum, Mum, Mum" Argh!
"she;s hitting me, she won't stop eating with her mouth open, she's got my top, shoes, boots, makeup on" I was forever turned off teenage kids, especially girls by the time I was 37. I had had enough. Luckily they all disappeared to be wives and mothers very quickly, just like I had, young. My Mother was glad to get rid of my Sister and me young and now I know just how she felt.
Boys are totally different. I had brothers and am now growing old around teen boys, they are much better. They are usually, shy, mumble and stay in their room a lot. They also are out with mates a lot. Girls tend to go nowhere unless they are driven and it has to be by Mum, for some reason.
God, who at 15 wants to even own up that they have a father, never minds spend time with him in a closed car. God! Gag a teen girl with a spoon. It's not the dad's fault, she doesn't want to be on her own with any male at that time, that comes later, much later. I never ever forget that my Dad told me the facts of life as my Mother was too chicken shit to.
I was mortified, embarrassed beyond all reason. I wanted the floor to open up right there in my Grandma and Grandads bedroom and crash down to the dining room underneath. Just as long as I didn't have to listen to my Dad talking about "girl stuff". But he did and now I look back and admire him for it. Couldn't have been easy. me there stood with my hands over my ears, emotionally, not physically.
I was so shy I didn't even like listening to Judy In Disguise as it had the word "bra" in it. How racy !
Interesting I had a Mother that was a British Prude and a Dad that associated with Strippers. I hasten to add he was a muso and muso's have another life. But usually it's all about the music all though Dad was like a Benny Hill sort of Dad, not smutty as he hated smut, but funny and irreverent. He teased my Mother up and down about her prudish ways. Just as well as if it had been up to her my Sister and I would have died Virgins.
She was pregnant again at 42 and was too prudish to tell us until she a month to go. A month, not like we hadn't noticed or anything. My Mother just didn't say, as per usual Dad had to tell us. She was "Just like that", weird, but she had a bad potty mouth, at times. She said the word "shit" a lot and "Buggered", maybe a "bastard" or two. But never Fuck or Cunt. They were just not in her vocabulary. I am the opposite I say the word Fuck a lot. Times have changed. They say these days women cry less and swear more.
My girls all swear like troopers. And when we get together. OMG, swear city. It's like a secret language to us. But only when we are with each other, Me, Deb, Yvette and Alena. It's like we have this secret little society of women that no one can penetrate. And I guess that's normal for us. We alone know what it was like to lose Lauren. We alone know what it was like to live under "Crazies" rules and survive.
We all knew we would get out from under one day and we did. We alone knew how to do it. No one could help us, we found that out, early on. No one wants to know your troubles, especially as domestic violence is such a hidden silent subject. We kept it hidden until counselling. My family knew about it, but what could they do? I had to be the one to stop it.
So we did, Deb challenged him as soon as she grew tall enough and I will never forget my shock when she broke into the bedroom, our bedroom and said,
"Hit me You Fucking Bastard", she was 18.
He went to hit her but he couldn't do it, the bully. He could knock Yvette and Alena around but he couldn't hit his oldest, mainly as she could look him in the eye. He only picked on people that were smaller than him. Shit head. And through those times our personalities were forged. I had never seen a man violent but my girls had and now they are no Pussy Cats.
They all can take down a man and have no problem in doing so. Their Dad taught them to box in the back yard when they started to get bullied at school and then they could use the same tricks on him. Yvette went out in the backyard once and threatened to shoot the boys over the back. She was 9 and had a unloaded rifle. He was arrested for having an illegal pistol and he always reminded me of where it was kept.
He told me he would kill me if I left him, hurt the girls, hurt members of my family. He siad he would kill the girls and burn the house down to see me suffer. Tried to run me over with a 5 year old Alena running with me, both of us ducking and weaving and hiding from him. I would always stand up to him, get between him and the girls and try to stop him.
So none of us is normal, now. We are "Affected", don't you love that word. But rather than become his victims for life we band together and clap ourselves on the back and say we are survivors. We survived. No matter what and we sill be trying to save others from the same thing, the rest of our lives Crazy or not xxx
Love Janette
Lauren
Alena
Debbie
Yvette
My oldest child said this week on Facebook she can't wait for her crazy, skinny arsed Mother to get home. Wonder who she means ? Oh, doh, that would be me. I often don't feel like my girls Mother anymore as they are so grown and I was so young when I had them. Just 24 by the time I had 4. I know 24 year olds that I wouldn't trust with a pet never mind 4 kids.
But that was me and I don't regret it for a second. I am still young enough o dance "The light Fantastic" and my girls are in their 30's and 40's. That is just insane. I have girlfriends younger than my girls. Best bosom buddies and the girlfriends have kids as young as my grand kids. I skipped a generation somewhere, I keep looking around for an eight year old I should still have somewhere stashed away.
I love being a grandma though, as I remember what absolute knock em down, huffy, door slamming stand off Princesses my girls were as teenagers and now they are all going through the same thing, with their kids. Oh the joy.. A mother gets her revenge at last. Mine, being girls, would fight and snitch and bitch and snarl, hit .hiss and beat each other, badly. If I heard,
"She's got my top on",
one more time I would have committed Hari Kari.
That and,
"Mum, do something!!!!!!!!"
I used to wait all day to get in the toilet and then they would stand outside the door,
"Mum, Mum, Mum" Argh!
"she;s hitting me, she won't stop eating with her mouth open, she's got my top, shoes, boots, makeup on" I was forever turned off teenage kids, especially girls by the time I was 37. I had had enough. Luckily they all disappeared to be wives and mothers very quickly, just like I had, young. My Mother was glad to get rid of my Sister and me young and now I know just how she felt.
Boys are totally different. I had brothers and am now growing old around teen boys, they are much better. They are usually, shy, mumble and stay in their room a lot. They also are out with mates a lot. Girls tend to go nowhere unless they are driven and it has to be by Mum, for some reason.
God, who at 15 wants to even own up that they have a father, never minds spend time with him in a closed car. God! Gag a teen girl with a spoon. It's not the dad's fault, she doesn't want to be on her own with any male at that time, that comes later, much later. I never ever forget that my Dad told me the facts of life as my Mother was too chicken shit to.
I was mortified, embarrassed beyond all reason. I wanted the floor to open up right there in my Grandma and Grandads bedroom and crash down to the dining room underneath. Just as long as I didn't have to listen to my Dad talking about "girl stuff". But he did and now I look back and admire him for it. Couldn't have been easy. me there stood with my hands over my ears, emotionally, not physically.
I was so shy I didn't even like listening to Judy In Disguise as it had the word "bra" in it. How racy !
Interesting I had a Mother that was a British Prude and a Dad that associated with Strippers. I hasten to add he was a muso and muso's have another life. But usually it's all about the music all though Dad was like a Benny Hill sort of Dad, not smutty as he hated smut, but funny and irreverent. He teased my Mother up and down about her prudish ways. Just as well as if it had been up to her my Sister and I would have died Virgins.
She was pregnant again at 42 and was too prudish to tell us until she a month to go. A month, not like we hadn't noticed or anything. My Mother just didn't say, as per usual Dad had to tell us. She was "Just like that", weird, but she had a bad potty mouth, at times. She said the word "shit" a lot and "Buggered", maybe a "bastard" or two. But never Fuck or Cunt. They were just not in her vocabulary. I am the opposite I say the word Fuck a lot. Times have changed. They say these days women cry less and swear more.
My girls all swear like troopers. And when we get together. OMG, swear city. It's like a secret language to us. But only when we are with each other, Me, Deb, Yvette and Alena. It's like we have this secret little society of women that no one can penetrate. And I guess that's normal for us. We alone know what it was like to lose Lauren. We alone know what it was like to live under "Crazies" rules and survive.
We all knew we would get out from under one day and we did. We alone knew how to do it. No one could help us, we found that out, early on. No one wants to know your troubles, especially as domestic violence is such a hidden silent subject. We kept it hidden until counselling. My family knew about it, but what could they do? I had to be the one to stop it.
So we did, Deb challenged him as soon as she grew tall enough and I will never forget my shock when she broke into the bedroom, our bedroom and said,
"Hit me You Fucking Bastard", she was 18.
He went to hit her but he couldn't do it, the bully. He could knock Yvette and Alena around but he couldn't hit his oldest, mainly as she could look him in the eye. He only picked on people that were smaller than him. Shit head. And through those times our personalities were forged. I had never seen a man violent but my girls had and now they are no Pussy Cats.
They all can take down a man and have no problem in doing so. Their Dad taught them to box in the back yard when they started to get bullied at school and then they could use the same tricks on him. Yvette went out in the backyard once and threatened to shoot the boys over the back. She was 9 and had a unloaded rifle. He was arrested for having an illegal pistol and he always reminded me of where it was kept.
He told me he would kill me if I left him, hurt the girls, hurt members of my family. He siad he would kill the girls and burn the house down to see me suffer. Tried to run me over with a 5 year old Alena running with me, both of us ducking and weaving and hiding from him. I would always stand up to him, get between him and the girls and try to stop him.
So none of us is normal, now. We are "Affected", don't you love that word. But rather than become his victims for life we band together and clap ourselves on the back and say we are survivors. We survived. No matter what and we sill be trying to save others from the same thing, the rest of our lives Crazy or not xxx
Love Janette
