I Feel Better
Without Prejudice
I feel so much better. For some reason my depression has lifted and I feel wonderful. It's like someone turns on the lights all of a sudden and I can see life like "normal" people do. The sun in Queensland has helped, my Family has helped, my daughters have helped and my chemical imbalance has balanced at last.
I spoke of it with my Sis yesterday and she understood. It is so wonderful to have someone else to talk to about it and that they understand. I no longer keep the stiff upper lip about it, I discuss it and we discuss Mum and we are so glad we are in this day and age where help and understanding is available.
I can once again take pleasure in life, read and not be jaded. Eat, sleep and not be tired. I can rejoice in this great thing we call life and not feel that it has no meaning. The lights are on and at last someone is home. I feel at peace with the world not asking it stupid dumb questions and I once again can take pleasure in other people's pleasure and not feel like I am in a glass fishbowl looking out.
I went for a bike ride yesterday. My brother insisted and pushed me off and at first I was terrified, not having ridden a bike for a long time. I wobbled and lurched and was scared I would come off but didn't. I had only a pair of thongs to wear on my feet and was shit scared I would scrape my toes or break my ankle, but I did it.
I then later on wobbled and lurched up the hill and found an old man who told me how to get to the op shop. I wanted something vintage for the cocktail party I am going to tonight. My younger brother and his bride to be having a cocktail party tonight for their engagement. the op shop was exactly as I like, big, fresh and staffed by old dears that want to help.
I found earrings and necklaces, bangles and dresses. I had watched 2 shows of my favourite stylist, Gok Wan and decided on the right skirt for my shape at last. Several dresses of colour and a white retro Broderie Anglaise waisted dress a la the fifties style I covet. It's white, crisp, tight at the bust, fitted at the waist and flared full out over the hips.
I bought a top I decided I liked, a cream sleeveless shell and was delighted when I looked at the label when I was home and found it to be 100 percent silk. I found stretcth belts of vintage 70's fashion and added it to my collection. I bought a red frilled vee neck top that goes well with the linen skirt I bought, And the whole lot cost me the tiny sum of $33.
I then sped home as the going was all down hill and there was no traffic at all. I rode past the old style house of fibro and cladding and big verandahed Queenslanders. No one on the paths or in yards, it's retiree heaven and no doubt they don't go out in the midday sun as I do. I pedalled and steered like I was once again a child of 10, delighting in the speed of down hill flight.
I now have a selection of outfits to wear tonight and I love that I have the choice, bringing only the basics up from Melbourne, tops and shorts and bathers and 2 dresses. I have always been a dress girl and a feminine girl with heels and stockings. I brought great underwear up with me from Melbourne as the basis of any look is good under garments.
I love my fashion, I always have, from about the age of 11 when a nasty girl at school said,
"Do you only have one dress ?"
At that time I did. My parents were not well off at that stage of my life and ever after I became a fashion slave and will be till I get wheeled into the nursing home or off the end of Mordialloc Pier and dumped unceremoniously in the sea there. I laugh and tell my girls that is what they can do if I get Ga Ga.
I have a lace cocktail dress in Aqua that I can wear with pearl choker and pearl earrings. I have an original 70's strapless floral I can wear with heels and diamante earrings and necklace. I have no black, none, as it's time for colour. And in Queensland you can wear colour and not the blacks, navies and greys of Melbourne, Black being to Melbourne what colour is to Queensland, expected !
I have dropped so many dress sizes now I can just about squeeze into a size 10 Australian and the lady yesterday said I am positively tiny on the hips and I still didn't believe her. I still have at times "fat brain" that tells me the woman I look at in the mirror is size 16 and that outfit on that hanger will never fit and it does.
Women wear fashion for other women and I wear it now for me, as it never fails to cheer me up. I watch good fashion stylists on Foxtel and learn the lessons about body shapes and I also watch design shows on homes for the same reason. I love things to be in harmony and balance and beautiful to look at. I remember my Mum in suits and gloves and natty hats, beautifully groomed and smelling of Chanel Number 5 and cigarette smoke.
She dressed in a cocktail dress for the Fancy Dress Competition on board the Southern Cross and a cigarette holder with a pastel coloured Cocktail Sobranie in her hand and a chain around her waist and was a "Chain Smoker" in the 60's.
She didn't win, a girl dressed as the Sydney Opera House won. We all wondered who brings a Sydney Opera House costume on board a ship ? To me she looked like an elephant with spikes on her back, but it was clever and she deserved to win. I was a tahitian Princess with bra top and grass skirt, very unimaginative but a lot of fun.
So tonight I will be dressed in at least the 3rd or 4th outfit I have chosen, the rest carelessly discarded on a chair and I will wear Chanel in remembrance of my original and very witty Mum.
Love Janette
I feel so much better. For some reason my depression has lifted and I feel wonderful. It's like someone turns on the lights all of a sudden and I can see life like "normal" people do. The sun in Queensland has helped, my Family has helped, my daughters have helped and my chemical imbalance has balanced at last.
I spoke of it with my Sis yesterday and she understood. It is so wonderful to have someone else to talk to about it and that they understand. I no longer keep the stiff upper lip about it, I discuss it and we discuss Mum and we are so glad we are in this day and age where help and understanding is available.
I can once again take pleasure in life, read and not be jaded. Eat, sleep and not be tired. I can rejoice in this great thing we call life and not feel that it has no meaning. The lights are on and at last someone is home. I feel at peace with the world not asking it stupid dumb questions and I once again can take pleasure in other people's pleasure and not feel like I am in a glass fishbowl looking out.
I went for a bike ride yesterday. My brother insisted and pushed me off and at first I was terrified, not having ridden a bike for a long time. I wobbled and lurched and was scared I would come off but didn't. I had only a pair of thongs to wear on my feet and was shit scared I would scrape my toes or break my ankle, but I did it.
I then later on wobbled and lurched up the hill and found an old man who told me how to get to the op shop. I wanted something vintage for the cocktail party I am going to tonight. My younger brother and his bride to be having a cocktail party tonight for their engagement. the op shop was exactly as I like, big, fresh and staffed by old dears that want to help.
I found earrings and necklaces, bangles and dresses. I had watched 2 shows of my favourite stylist, Gok Wan and decided on the right skirt for my shape at last. Several dresses of colour and a white retro Broderie Anglaise waisted dress a la the fifties style I covet. It's white, crisp, tight at the bust, fitted at the waist and flared full out over the hips.
I bought a top I decided I liked, a cream sleeveless shell and was delighted when I looked at the label when I was home and found it to be 100 percent silk. I found stretcth belts of vintage 70's fashion and added it to my collection. I bought a red frilled vee neck top that goes well with the linen skirt I bought, And the whole lot cost me the tiny sum of $33.
I then sped home as the going was all down hill and there was no traffic at all. I rode past the old style house of fibro and cladding and big verandahed Queenslanders. No one on the paths or in yards, it's retiree heaven and no doubt they don't go out in the midday sun as I do. I pedalled and steered like I was once again a child of 10, delighting in the speed of down hill flight.
I now have a selection of outfits to wear tonight and I love that I have the choice, bringing only the basics up from Melbourne, tops and shorts and bathers and 2 dresses. I have always been a dress girl and a feminine girl with heels and stockings. I brought great underwear up with me from Melbourne as the basis of any look is good under garments.
I love my fashion, I always have, from about the age of 11 when a nasty girl at school said,
"Do you only have one dress ?"
At that time I did. My parents were not well off at that stage of my life and ever after I became a fashion slave and will be till I get wheeled into the nursing home or off the end of Mordialloc Pier and dumped unceremoniously in the sea there. I laugh and tell my girls that is what they can do if I get Ga Ga.
I have a lace cocktail dress in Aqua that I can wear with pearl choker and pearl earrings. I have an original 70's strapless floral I can wear with heels and diamante earrings and necklace. I have no black, none, as it's time for colour. And in Queensland you can wear colour and not the blacks, navies and greys of Melbourne, Black being to Melbourne what colour is to Queensland, expected !
I have dropped so many dress sizes now I can just about squeeze into a size 10 Australian and the lady yesterday said I am positively tiny on the hips and I still didn't believe her. I still have at times "fat brain" that tells me the woman I look at in the mirror is size 16 and that outfit on that hanger will never fit and it does.
Women wear fashion for other women and I wear it now for me, as it never fails to cheer me up. I watch good fashion stylists on Foxtel and learn the lessons about body shapes and I also watch design shows on homes for the same reason. I love things to be in harmony and balance and beautiful to look at. I remember my Mum in suits and gloves and natty hats, beautifully groomed and smelling of Chanel Number 5 and cigarette smoke.
She dressed in a cocktail dress for the Fancy Dress Competition on board the Southern Cross and a cigarette holder with a pastel coloured Cocktail Sobranie in her hand and a chain around her waist and was a "Chain Smoker" in the 60's.
She didn't win, a girl dressed as the Sydney Opera House won. We all wondered who brings a Sydney Opera House costume on board a ship ? To me she looked like an elephant with spikes on her back, but it was clever and she deserved to win. I was a tahitian Princess with bra top and grass skirt, very unimaginative but a lot of fun.
So tonight I will be dressed in at least the 3rd or 4th outfit I have chosen, the rest carelessly discarded on a chair and I will wear Chanel in remembrance of my original and very witty Mum.
Love Janette
