Mourning
Without Prejudice
At least now her death is behind us and not ahead of us any more, Bonnie, our queenly old Alsatian. She waited until after Mandy was buried on Thurday, she waited until Kayko's birthday, Saturday, unable to eat the "Birthday Cake", and Bonnnie liked her cake. always.
We knew Bonnie was dying, the vet telling us weeks ago, it was only a matter of time.Nothing we could do for her, old age.
She was still running around till Friday and by Friday night she was slipping away, just shutting down, so dignified.
Her new squeaky toy no longer interested her, food no, water, yes.
We sat with her, lay with her, but she wanted to find a "Place", and she did.
We found her Saturday afternoon, sitting around the side of my unit and she didn't want to move, but Yvette and I coaxed her out and she hid under the front steps of my unit, then, so very quiet, docile, dreamy.
So we went under there with her, telling her how beautiful she was, a great dog. The last sense to go is the hearing. And one by one they came, the boys, to spend time with their Friend of 11 years. Jai cried, he was 2 when she first came to live with them..
A runt, tiny, not expected to live and she did live and they grew up with her. Kyle came after work and was angry, she wasn't dying, she was just sick. Yvette and I crying but only with each other. So fierce the boys, that she was NOT going to die, she was just sick. And their insistence that she die at home in her sleep, and Yvette and I kept our own counsel, knowing if she made one whimper of pain..........
So we stayed with her and gathered her up and took her inside to her bed in the laundry. And Saturday night we took it in shifts to be with her, her eyes were fading but still she heard us. We kissed her grey muzzle amd stroked her, she very regal, just watching us as we approached.
The boys couldn't bear it, but all still insisted she die in her sleep.
I slept not at all. letting Yvette sleep a few hours, and let Bonnie out, she was very shaky but made it to the water Bucket, drinking and collapsing. Kayko, the husky, nudging her to get up. But she wouldn't, so I left her there wrapped in a huge furry blanket, only her head out. Yvette found her in the kennel then and she rallied and had her head up, I checked her too and her head was up looking at me and she was fine.
Then within minutes as we sat inside, she had disappeared, and we knew she couldn't walk, we found her slumped in her original spot. The side of my unit, the distance a fair one when you can't walk.
So she must have dragged herself there, determined to die on her own terms. And we honoured that. She was getting cold, so we wrapped her in her blanket, her eyes still alive but dimming.
Her eyelashes still flickered, her ears twitched at Yvette's voice, but we sensed she didn't want us there, so we went inside and watched her from the window above, her guardian angels, and we saw her go, one last stretch with her jaw, reaching for something, her last gasp of life and with no sound, she died, brave to the last.
And we were glad the boys insisted she die at home, no strange vet, just us, her beloved family, she died surrounded by love in "her" backyard, and it was mercifully quick and now we mourn, Yvette and me and the boys, and as I write this, blinded by tears "We will always be together in Electric Dreams", comes on the radio. Laurens favourite song, and I know Bonnie is alright,
running with strong body and new lungs, barking in a beautiful new home,
RIP
Love Janette
At least now her death is behind us and not ahead of us any more, Bonnie, our queenly old Alsatian. She waited until after Mandy was buried on Thurday, she waited until Kayko's birthday, Saturday, unable to eat the "Birthday Cake", and Bonnnie liked her cake. always.
We knew Bonnie was dying, the vet telling us weeks ago, it was only a matter of time.Nothing we could do for her, old age.
She was still running around till Friday and by Friday night she was slipping away, just shutting down, so dignified.
Her new squeaky toy no longer interested her, food no, water, yes.
We sat with her, lay with her, but she wanted to find a "Place", and she did.
We found her Saturday afternoon, sitting around the side of my unit and she didn't want to move, but Yvette and I coaxed her out and she hid under the front steps of my unit, then, so very quiet, docile, dreamy.
So we went under there with her, telling her how beautiful she was, a great dog. The last sense to go is the hearing. And one by one they came, the boys, to spend time with their Friend of 11 years. Jai cried, he was 2 when she first came to live with them..
A runt, tiny, not expected to live and she did live and they grew up with her. Kyle came after work and was angry, she wasn't dying, she was just sick. Yvette and I crying but only with each other. So fierce the boys, that she was NOT going to die, she was just sick. And their insistence that she die at home in her sleep, and Yvette and I kept our own counsel, knowing if she made one whimper of pain..........
So we stayed with her and gathered her up and took her inside to her bed in the laundry. And Saturday night we took it in shifts to be with her, her eyes were fading but still she heard us. We kissed her grey muzzle amd stroked her, she very regal, just watching us as we approached.
The boys couldn't bear it, but all still insisted she die in her sleep.
I slept not at all. letting Yvette sleep a few hours, and let Bonnie out, she was very shaky but made it to the water Bucket, drinking and collapsing. Kayko, the husky, nudging her to get up. But she wouldn't, so I left her there wrapped in a huge furry blanket, only her head out. Yvette found her in the kennel then and she rallied and had her head up, I checked her too and her head was up looking at me and she was fine.
Then within minutes as we sat inside, she had disappeared, and we knew she couldn't walk, we found her slumped in her original spot. The side of my unit, the distance a fair one when you can't walk.
So she must have dragged herself there, determined to die on her own terms. And we honoured that. She was getting cold, so we wrapped her in her blanket, her eyes still alive but dimming.
Her eyelashes still flickered, her ears twitched at Yvette's voice, but we sensed she didn't want us there, so we went inside and watched her from the window above, her guardian angels, and we saw her go, one last stretch with her jaw, reaching for something, her last gasp of life and with no sound, she died, brave to the last.
And we were glad the boys insisted she die at home, no strange vet, just us, her beloved family, she died surrounded by love in "her" backyard, and it was mercifully quick and now we mourn, Yvette and me and the boys, and as I write this, blinded by tears "We will always be together in Electric Dreams", comes on the radio. Laurens favourite song, and I know Bonnie is alright,
running with strong body and new lungs, barking in a beautiful new home,
RIP
Love Janette
