Sex, the cane and naughty schoolgirls 7
Without Prejudice
Denise and I are so curious about this thing called S.E.X., we were too ashamed to ask the girls that seemed to know at 12. We were fascinated by it. But how were we going to find out? The books in the library were just hopeless. Denise pointed out that there had to be a penis and it had to fill up with blood. We looked at each other in confusion that day in the library. What did it all mean?
I never told Mum and Dad about the "fanny" incident and I never told them about "That Man" that tried to get me in the car when it was the day of my 12th birthday. I didn't tell Denise either or anyone. But it was there in my memory. I went to the dentist by myself that Saturday morning. All dressed up in my pretty gingham brown and white dress with the frill at the bottom. I was allowed to wear stockings for the first time and tiny high heels. I was so very happy that day.
It was all sunny and bright at Mornington and I felt so grown up and smart. The dentist had bad breath, just like my old piano teacher, Mr Lombard. But it was soon over, Thank God ! I hate the dentist but I said to Mum instead of money for my Birthday, I wanted to go the dentist. I knew we had no money for stuff like that. But they would send her the bill and she wouldn't pay it, just like all the bills. We'd skip town again, when the bills pile up. And when the debt collectors came to the front door, we'd just tell them Dad didn't live there.
I hated doing it, so usually one of the brothers would do it and I would hide until they went away. So after the dentist I went shopping in Woolies. They had great "scraps" in there for my collection. I liked the glittery ones best, the ladies of paper with their ball gowns. Or I really was hoping to find a cut out book with a cardboard doll I could dress up with paper clothes. I had 2 shillings Mum had given me.
I noticed a man was following me for some reason, I would catch glimpses of him out of the corner of my eye wherever I went. I went in one shop and out quickly and he was still following me. My heart was thudding out of my chest. Who was he and what did he want. He was frightening me. I went back into Woolies and spent an hour looking for scraps and paper dolls, I sniffed the soap dollies, oh, that smell was delicious.I walked out again and he was right behind me on the pavement so I went and looked in the Toy shop window, just standing there and just looking.
The man came and stood beside me.
"I'll buy you some of those toys if you come in the car with me ", he said.
His voice was quiet and he had an English accent.
My throat felt dry and my voice came out all squeaky and high.
"If you don't go away, I'm calling the Police", I said and I crossed the road in panic and walked to the Police Station. I hid behind the columns and I saw him get in his car and drive away.
He looked younger than my Dad but he was a grown up. He looked about 30. I was really frightened and shook but I managed to get the bus home. I didn't go in the Police Station and I didn't dare tell Mum and Dad or anyone. I'd never be allowed out again on my own but now I didn't want to. I just wanted to hide away. Who was that man and what did he want ? I can't remember Mum and Dad ever telling me about men like that but I knew he made me feel sick and hot and ashamed.
I put the stockings away and the little high heels and the brown and white gingham dress, I didn't want to wear them again. There was something horrible about them and him and it was all mixed up in my brain together. I went to Darcy State School then at Mount Martha and then to Unley in Adelaide and then to England. I was at Unley when Jenny tossed me an old bra of hers and said I had to start wearing it. I didn't understand but I wore it to School the next day and some of the girls said about time.
I was so embarrassed and my face went red. And an older boy there started following me on his bike. I ignored him and still he followed me every afternoon, always keeping out of sight a little. I walked then with Jay or Dennis and he gave up following me, thank God? I didn't understand what he wanted form me and I still don't. The boys at Grammar school are just young and annoying, they say rude things but they say rude things to all the girls. They are all so small and weedy anyway. I love that word weedy. Jenny gave me Coronet amongst the weeds to read and I love it.
Mum gave me Catch 22 as well before my 12th Birthday and I read it and I liked it as well. So strange and weird but funny at the same time, I can't get over the man who can't see the flies in his eyes as he has flies in his eyes. I don't understand all of it but I think it's about how stupid the Army can be. Mum cried when Lachlan went in the army but he seems to like it. He looks really good in his uniform, but he still treats us kids like we are babies and he is so above us. Doesn't talk much and he and Mum get on really well.
Denise and I are so curious about this thing called S.E.X., we were too ashamed to ask the girls that seemed to know at 12. We were fascinated by it. But how were we going to find out? The books in the library were just hopeless. Denise pointed out that there had to be a penis and it had to fill up with blood. We looked at each other in confusion that day in the library. What did it all mean?
I never told Mum and Dad about the "fanny" incident and I never told them about "That Man" that tried to get me in the car when it was the day of my 12th birthday. I didn't tell Denise either or anyone. But it was there in my memory. I went to the dentist by myself that Saturday morning. All dressed up in my pretty gingham brown and white dress with the frill at the bottom. I was allowed to wear stockings for the first time and tiny high heels. I was so very happy that day.
It was all sunny and bright at Mornington and I felt so grown up and smart. The dentist had bad breath, just like my old piano teacher, Mr Lombard. But it was soon over, Thank God ! I hate the dentist but I said to Mum instead of money for my Birthday, I wanted to go the dentist. I knew we had no money for stuff like that. But they would send her the bill and she wouldn't pay it, just like all the bills. We'd skip town again, when the bills pile up. And when the debt collectors came to the front door, we'd just tell them Dad didn't live there.
I hated doing it, so usually one of the brothers would do it and I would hide until they went away. So after the dentist I went shopping in Woolies. They had great "scraps" in there for my collection. I liked the glittery ones best, the ladies of paper with their ball gowns. Or I really was hoping to find a cut out book with a cardboard doll I could dress up with paper clothes. I had 2 shillings Mum had given me.
I noticed a man was following me for some reason, I would catch glimpses of him out of the corner of my eye wherever I went. I went in one shop and out quickly and he was still following me. My heart was thudding out of my chest. Who was he and what did he want. He was frightening me. I went back into Woolies and spent an hour looking for scraps and paper dolls, I sniffed the soap dollies, oh, that smell was delicious.I walked out again and he was right behind me on the pavement so I went and looked in the Toy shop window, just standing there and just looking.
The man came and stood beside me.
"I'll buy you some of those toys if you come in the car with me ", he said.
His voice was quiet and he had an English accent.
My throat felt dry and my voice came out all squeaky and high.
"If you don't go away, I'm calling the Police", I said and I crossed the road in panic and walked to the Police Station. I hid behind the columns and I saw him get in his car and drive away.
He looked younger than my Dad but he was a grown up. He looked about 30. I was really frightened and shook but I managed to get the bus home. I didn't go in the Police Station and I didn't dare tell Mum and Dad or anyone. I'd never be allowed out again on my own but now I didn't want to. I just wanted to hide away. Who was that man and what did he want ? I can't remember Mum and Dad ever telling me about men like that but I knew he made me feel sick and hot and ashamed.
I put the stockings away and the little high heels and the brown and white gingham dress, I didn't want to wear them again. There was something horrible about them and him and it was all mixed up in my brain together. I went to Darcy State School then at Mount Martha and then to Unley in Adelaide and then to England. I was at Unley when Jenny tossed me an old bra of hers and said I had to start wearing it. I didn't understand but I wore it to School the next day and some of the girls said about time.
I was so embarrassed and my face went red. And an older boy there started following me on his bike. I ignored him and still he followed me every afternoon, always keeping out of sight a little. I walked then with Jay or Dennis and he gave up following me, thank God? I didn't understand what he wanted form me and I still don't. The boys at Grammar school are just young and annoying, they say rude things but they say rude things to all the girls. They are all so small and weedy anyway. I love that word weedy. Jenny gave me Coronet amongst the weeds to read and I love it.
Mum gave me Catch 22 as well before my 12th Birthday and I read it and I liked it as well. So strange and weird but funny at the same time, I can't get over the man who can't see the flies in his eyes as he has flies in his eyes. I don't understand all of it but I think it's about how stupid the Army can be. Mum cried when Lachlan went in the army but he seems to like it. He looks really good in his uniform, but he still treats us kids like we are babies and he is so above us. Doesn't talk much and he and Mum get on really well.
