Sex, the cane and naughty schoolgirls 1
Without Prejudice
And so at 12 my adult life begins. My Mother and Father are being charming as ever and my toad of a brother, too. I just wish they'd hurry up, it's cold in this cavernous hall of tile and tile. Some customs hall. Some old bat is talking to Jay and of course he's replying, smarmy bastard. He's probably hoping for a shilling to pass his way. Dennis fidgets beside me and I stare at him and then at them, hurry up, hurry up.
I'm freezing to death.
Finally they shut up talking and we're on our way, some sooty old train pulls up, full of plebs and we scramble for seats Dennis and I. Of course Mum and Dad have to interfere and we have to go with them into some smelly carriage. Jay is raving on about the old dear says she was a smuggler or something with watches up her arm. She asked him to carry her bag and it turns out it was full of more duty free stuff she shouldn't have had.
Jay drones on and I try to block him out. He's such a show off and a pimply dweeb and I hate his guts. He only shows off to get favour with Mum, she calls him her blue eyed boy, Jesus! I stare out the grimy window at this my new home, England, it's dark, dreary cold, grubby brown snow lies to my left in banks and mounds and it looks bleak. This is what we have come twelve thousand miles for and I am not the least bit excited. just numb. We spent the best part of the crossing of the channel heaving our guts up as my insane Father decided to buy the huge bars of Cadbury's chocolate and feed them to us.
Next thing we are on the top deck heaving into the wind and the vomit flew back in our faces and made us vomit more. The decks awash with it as the rails are lined with other Aussies heaving their guts up too. How disgusting it all is, the dark, the wind, the rolling waves crashing against the bow and vomit and spit awash on the deck. Welcome to England you mad fools. Once a again we have no choice, once again we have to move, mainly as my Mater and Pater can't get their act together and I'm leaving them as soon as I'm old enough.
I'll be 16 in four years and then you won't see me with them anymore. I'll live in the city and have a flat with a friend. They will cry of course and want me to come home and I will be kind and say no, my new life is here now. Every time we have to move because "he" can't pay the bills and she's just as bad with her snobby ways and running up store accounts with no intention of paying. How can I love them and hate them all at the same time.
My feet are frozen in the suede ankle boots bought in Pireaeus, the soles are no more than thin cardboard and the seller was a fat oily Greek man that smiled with gold teeth. He gave me a wink, especially for me and I turned away. Mum told me off so I turned back around and gave him an oily smile back.I already know what Greek men are like. The one that was supposed to be my friend on the Ellenis, The Breakfast Captain or whatever title he had, tickled me on the fanny outside my dress as I was walking down the stairs behind him. Disgusting old man. I'm 12 I felt like screaming at him. I'm 12.
I made sure I stayed out of his way after that and Mum and Dad wondered why but I wasn't about to tell them. So humiliating and disgusting. Dennis was beside me and I looked across at him first, he's 8, not a chance, and he's my weenie little brother, anyway. I saw the hands of the man in front of me hands behind his back like Prince Charles walks and I thought. Eeeuuuuwwww ! Disgusting old pig. before that I thought he was so nice to me and my Mum and Dad and he's just a disgusting old pervert. Great !
Touched my fanny or as Jenny calls it her front bottom, she's 16 and should know better. I know the girls at school called it a fanny and mine is a hairless one and I hope it stays that way. I saw those bigger girls in the changing rooms for swimming with their big hairy bushes and was properly appalled. That's the first time I had seen a naked female body except mine and it wasn't great.
That oily man in Pireaus gave me a knowing look as he sold my mother the cardboard soled boots and I shuddered, just because I have just started breasts. Jenny had to give me one of her old bras as Mum didn't mention it and Jenny was fed up. Its too big and when I went to school with it on, they all said,
'About Time !" How awful is that ?
I look older than what I am or maybe they all have a thing for little girls. In Rome and Naples it was the same. Men pinching our bums and we ran backwards, Mum and Jenny and I and they laughed, the men. young, old, didn't matter.
They laughed at our modesty and embarrasment and called out Cara Mia, Ti Amo, or something in the hot baking sunlight and we hid in the coolness of the sheltered shop fronts, our faces burning with shame
Mum wanted bread and we went in shop after shop and no one could understand us as we made eating bread, cutting bread, hand movements. Pretty stupid when you think about it. Mum finally remembered her Grammar School French and said the word Pain, pronounced Pane and they twigged. They should be be had up for false advertising, those people as they had signs in the window that said English Spoken Here and no one did.
We had disembarked from the luxury ship and roamed around Rome, hot and blindingly bright. We trooped around as wilting tourists to dumb things like the ancient ruins, (ruined) and paintings on ceilings and lots and lots of steps. That done we arrived at a train station and found in our carriage a baslet wrapped bottle of wine and grabbed it and hid it until Dad told us every carriage received one. Aste Spumanti.
Jay was being a shite so Dad was on top of him red faced and sweating ready to strangle the rotten bully of a bastard till the Steward came through the door and Dad hopped up all smiles and acting like he wasn't going to kill Jay at all. The trip went over the snow covered mountains of Switzerland, I think, There were peaks anyway. Then we were in Paris.
We trudged around the Louvre and stuff and it was boring and I knew I should be in awe of all the wonder that is was supposed to be but I never wanted to see another painting or old building again as long as I lived. My parents skipped out on the bill in the cafe as tea and a bun for us all was like 18 Quid and then the man from the cafe came out and demanded his money and my parents refused and there was a lot of yelling. I just put my head down and pretended to be tying my boots.
Dennis joined me on the floor and sat arms across his chest until the yelling stopped, we peeped up and saw the man shaking his fist outside of the window. Good, all over then. This was bad news and meant my parents had run out of money but both were good talkers, so looked like they had been able to get away with it. I wondered how we were going to get to my Grandparents place in Yorkshire but I knew Dad would come up with something.
We were all aware of how bent he was. Hadn't he heaved a sigh of relief when we had passed outside of Australian Territorial waters he told us as he had sold the cars and furniture to get our fare home and all the stuff was on hire purchase. Jay told me and Dennis that if Dad was caught he would have been arrested by the FEDERAL POLICE!. And he said it just like that in capital letters. I may have only been twelve but I thought whata a load of crock, Dad wasn't an international drug runner or famous jewel thief. He was a small time con artist, small potatoes, very small potatoes.
Funnily enough my oldest Brother, John, who was staying behind in Australia as he was in the Army had bought Dad an elecrtic razor as a going away present.It was knocked off on the first day on board and was never seen again and we thought Dad was a thief! He made a big fuss as electric razors were a new thing at that time and it was a present from his son, but no one knew anything of course.
Kings Cross Station is next, huge, echoing chamber of noise and confusion with more people than I had ever seen gathered in the one place. Smells of fried bacon, beans and hot fat somewhere off to the side as we sat on our cases and waited for Dad. He was talking forcibly to another Scot high up in a window of an office above the platform. There were smiles and a handshake and Dad came back with tickets for all of us on The Flying Scotsman, destination Wakefield Yorkshire.
Dad waited till we were on the train before he said the man had loaned him the money in good faith and I inwardly groaned, that meant the man would be whistling for his money and would never get paid. I hate it when Dad does this it's so humiliating! We even had enough money for tea and a sticky bun and I didn't want one. I glared at my Dad but he didn't catch my glance as he stuck into his bun, I hoped he would choke on it, deceiving that man. so.
We all arrived at my Auntie Pams in Outreach and she was delighted, so delighted. Auntie Pam is a great big woman, massive bosoms let loose in a nightie the size of a circus tent. I hoped she wouldn't bend over as those massive things looked like they shouldn't be let loose. I am so glad we are staying here, Jenny and I as there is a bathroom all done out. Roses carpet in there and all pink and white and smells divine.
The others go off in a taxi to Grandma's who we meet tomorrow but Auntie Pam has already said it's a shared loo with 8 other tenants in a cement block outside. I look out at the snow on the ground and smile. That means Jay will be cold when he slogs off to the loo, hope he freezes his bum off. On the way here he kept telling me to shut my mouth, don't speak. Jesus. He's only 19 babbing months older than me. Who does he think he is ?
A God walks in, looking like Elvis and it's my cousin Ken, 16 years old like Jenny and I see her perk up straight away. He rides a motor bike and promises to take us for a ride. He's Auntie Pams youngest son, there is another Andrew but he is married and lives elsewhere. Jenny and I stare unashamedly at Ken, he is so very good looking. He has a mate with him and they tease us about our Aussie accents. We tease them about their Yorkshire ones, Malcolm, the mate says,
"Well I'm off laking, I'll shut t door on me way out"
Jenny says to Ken,
"What did he say?"
"He's off out to play, and he will shut the door on the way out"
There apparently is no "the" in the Yorkshire language then, it's either missed out all together or you have you say T instead, said as a Tuh as in Huh.
I practice the new way of speaking until it's time for bed and Jenny gives me a clout for being annoying. She's so superior at her age, I have always been annoying to her and it's something I mean to contunue. We're sharing a double bed and she ignores me as I go to chatter and turns her back on me. I'm lying here in England I say to myself, England, I can't beleive it. It;s my home, where I was born, so very strange and yet somehow mine. I can't make head nor tail of it and fall into a dreamless sleep.
Ken is here this morning early and Jenny and I scarmble to bathe and dress. Ther's no shower in the bathroom, just a big bath and a hand basin, and a toilet. Thats a pain as I am forever on it and Jenny screams at me to get out. I of course ignore he and go on tidying my hair and sweep it up into a small beehiave to see how it will look. Jenny is red in the face by the time I am finished and I congratulate myself for getting one back on her.
Ken is downstairs with some friends, girl ones, and they all start talking at once. They are all Jenny;s age but they include me in their conversation. All of them smoke and Jenny and I look at them like they are aliens. Jesus, God, I think, fancy smoking at their age. They invite us to a club for that night, and I think, Yes! But of course my dumb sister has to say in front of everyone that I'm only 12.
"Dress her up", says Lorraine one of the girls.
"Yeah, put some make up on her and she'll pass for 16", ays the other girl, Moira.
I'm begging mentally for Jenn to say OK and she does. I'm dizzy with excitement and can't wait for tonight.
Auntie Pam gets up and we get to meet my Uncle Dave. He's a gravel voiced Yorkshireman, and he smokes like a train, coughing up gunk into a hankie, that he inspects the contents of before tucking it into his pocket. We eat breakfast at a gate legged table that normally sits againt the wall. Auntie Pam pulls it out with a flourish. Jenny and I go into the kitchen to help her prepare and there isn't enough room for all of us in there.
It's so tiny.
Auntie Pam call it her "Galley" kitchen and it's no more than al sliver of a room with countertops on either side, a stove and a sink, a washer tucked under one of the benches. There are cupboards over head full of hidden delights. Auntie Pam is no slouch when it comes to food, obviously. She shoos us out of the kitchen and we sit on chairs at the gate leg table. We shyly chat to Uncle Dave and can only make out one word of two of what he is saying. I nod politely at what I hope are the right bits and shake my head at others.
Jenny looks just as bewildered as me. Auntie Pam sets down huge plates of breakfast in front of us. Tiny little sausages, and streaky bacon, eggs, beans, tomatoes and fried bread. I am starving and I eat everything. Big pots of tea are made and we drink cup after cup Jenny and I, just to be polite. Jenny is a biggish girl a lot bigger than me. I have never been able to wear her hand me downs as I am as scrawny as a stick. Thin arms, thin legs, biggish bust for my age. no waist and the bane of my life, thin blonde hair, whispy and staright.
Jenny is pretty, plump, and has long thick curly hair which is a hairdressers dream and I have been told this all my life. Jenny is a bitch about it and pees herself laughing when as a kid of 6 or 7 Mum would try and rag roll my hair or curl it with hot tongs. Jenny would roll on the floor with laughter as you could see the curl drop out before your eyes.And once again I would be back to straight hair in what she called "My Roman Soldier" haircut. Straight fringe, cut around my ears and straight across the back.
So this afternoon with the help of Auntie Pam and lots of lacquer and pins we get it up in a chignon for the club. Mum and Dad we haven't told as we can't reach them by phone at Grandmas. Jenny says we're not staying long anyway. Lorraine brings an empire line dress for me from her house and we all wear stocking and high heels. I must look old enough as I get past the bouncer at the door with the crowd of us that has grown to ten.
Inside the hall is smoke and music and noise. Jenny disappears immediately, off with her new found friends and straight away a boy comes up and asks me to dance. I am tempted to resist as I have never danced with a boy before except at those tedious old barn dances we used to go to in Canowindra. All sweaty palmed old men and tall boys that danced with us and swung me off my feet as I was so little. So I dance with him and the next thing we are kissing.
I am in love! It's heaven to be kissing this boy on the dance floor and we sit back down rather suddenly and there is more kissing and his tongue is inside my mouth and it feels very strange.
And so at 12 my adult life begins. My Mother and Father are being charming as ever and my toad of a brother, too. I just wish they'd hurry up, it's cold in this cavernous hall of tile and tile. Some customs hall. Some old bat is talking to Jay and of course he's replying, smarmy bastard. He's probably hoping for a shilling to pass his way. Dennis fidgets beside me and I stare at him and then at them, hurry up, hurry up.
I'm freezing to death.
Finally they shut up talking and we're on our way, some sooty old train pulls up, full of plebs and we scramble for seats Dennis and I. Of course Mum and Dad have to interfere and we have to go with them into some smelly carriage. Jay is raving on about the old dear says she was a smuggler or something with watches up her arm. She asked him to carry her bag and it turns out it was full of more duty free stuff she shouldn't have had.
Jay drones on and I try to block him out. He's such a show off and a pimply dweeb and I hate his guts. He only shows off to get favour with Mum, she calls him her blue eyed boy, Jesus! I stare out the grimy window at this my new home, England, it's dark, dreary cold, grubby brown snow lies to my left in banks and mounds and it looks bleak. This is what we have come twelve thousand miles for and I am not the least bit excited. just numb. We spent the best part of the crossing of the channel heaving our guts up as my insane Father decided to buy the huge bars of Cadbury's chocolate and feed them to us.
Next thing we are on the top deck heaving into the wind and the vomit flew back in our faces and made us vomit more. The decks awash with it as the rails are lined with other Aussies heaving their guts up too. How disgusting it all is, the dark, the wind, the rolling waves crashing against the bow and vomit and spit awash on the deck. Welcome to England you mad fools. Once a again we have no choice, once again we have to move, mainly as my Mater and Pater can't get their act together and I'm leaving them as soon as I'm old enough.
I'll be 16 in four years and then you won't see me with them anymore. I'll live in the city and have a flat with a friend. They will cry of course and want me to come home and I will be kind and say no, my new life is here now. Every time we have to move because "he" can't pay the bills and she's just as bad with her snobby ways and running up store accounts with no intention of paying. How can I love them and hate them all at the same time.
My feet are frozen in the suede ankle boots bought in Pireaeus, the soles are no more than thin cardboard and the seller was a fat oily Greek man that smiled with gold teeth. He gave me a wink, especially for me and I turned away. Mum told me off so I turned back around and gave him an oily smile back.I already know what Greek men are like. The one that was supposed to be my friend on the Ellenis, The Breakfast Captain or whatever title he had, tickled me on the fanny outside my dress as I was walking down the stairs behind him. Disgusting old man. I'm 12 I felt like screaming at him. I'm 12.
I made sure I stayed out of his way after that and Mum and Dad wondered why but I wasn't about to tell them. So humiliating and disgusting. Dennis was beside me and I looked across at him first, he's 8, not a chance, and he's my weenie little brother, anyway. I saw the hands of the man in front of me hands behind his back like Prince Charles walks and I thought. Eeeuuuuwwww ! Disgusting old pig. before that I thought he was so nice to me and my Mum and Dad and he's just a disgusting old pervert. Great !
Touched my fanny or as Jenny calls it her front bottom, she's 16 and should know better. I know the girls at school called it a fanny and mine is a hairless one and I hope it stays that way. I saw those bigger girls in the changing rooms for swimming with their big hairy bushes and was properly appalled. That's the first time I had seen a naked female body except mine and it wasn't great.
That oily man in Pireaus gave me a knowing look as he sold my mother the cardboard soled boots and I shuddered, just because I have just started breasts. Jenny had to give me one of her old bras as Mum didn't mention it and Jenny was fed up. Its too big and when I went to school with it on, they all said,
'About Time !" How awful is that ?
I look older than what I am or maybe they all have a thing for little girls. In Rome and Naples it was the same. Men pinching our bums and we ran backwards, Mum and Jenny and I and they laughed, the men. young, old, didn't matter.
They laughed at our modesty and embarrasment and called out Cara Mia, Ti Amo, or something in the hot baking sunlight and we hid in the coolness of the sheltered shop fronts, our faces burning with shame
Mum wanted bread and we went in shop after shop and no one could understand us as we made eating bread, cutting bread, hand movements. Pretty stupid when you think about it. Mum finally remembered her Grammar School French and said the word Pain, pronounced Pane and they twigged. They should be be had up for false advertising, those people as they had signs in the window that said English Spoken Here and no one did.
We had disembarked from the luxury ship and roamed around Rome, hot and blindingly bright. We trooped around as wilting tourists to dumb things like the ancient ruins, (ruined) and paintings on ceilings and lots and lots of steps. That done we arrived at a train station and found in our carriage a baslet wrapped bottle of wine and grabbed it and hid it until Dad told us every carriage received one. Aste Spumanti.
Jay was being a shite so Dad was on top of him red faced and sweating ready to strangle the rotten bully of a bastard till the Steward came through the door and Dad hopped up all smiles and acting like he wasn't going to kill Jay at all. The trip went over the snow covered mountains of Switzerland, I think, There were peaks anyway. Then we were in Paris.
We trudged around the Louvre and stuff and it was boring and I knew I should be in awe of all the wonder that is was supposed to be but I never wanted to see another painting or old building again as long as I lived. My parents skipped out on the bill in the cafe as tea and a bun for us all was like 18 Quid and then the man from the cafe came out and demanded his money and my parents refused and there was a lot of yelling. I just put my head down and pretended to be tying my boots.
Dennis joined me on the floor and sat arms across his chest until the yelling stopped, we peeped up and saw the man shaking his fist outside of the window. Good, all over then. This was bad news and meant my parents had run out of money but both were good talkers, so looked like they had been able to get away with it. I wondered how we were going to get to my Grandparents place in Yorkshire but I knew Dad would come up with something.
We were all aware of how bent he was. Hadn't he heaved a sigh of relief when we had passed outside of Australian Territorial waters he told us as he had sold the cars and furniture to get our fare home and all the stuff was on hire purchase. Jay told me and Dennis that if Dad was caught he would have been arrested by the FEDERAL POLICE!. And he said it just like that in capital letters. I may have only been twelve but I thought whata a load of crock, Dad wasn't an international drug runner or famous jewel thief. He was a small time con artist, small potatoes, very small potatoes.
Funnily enough my oldest Brother, John, who was staying behind in Australia as he was in the Army had bought Dad an elecrtic razor as a going away present.It was knocked off on the first day on board and was never seen again and we thought Dad was a thief! He made a big fuss as electric razors were a new thing at that time and it was a present from his son, but no one knew anything of course.
Kings Cross Station is next, huge, echoing chamber of noise and confusion with more people than I had ever seen gathered in the one place. Smells of fried bacon, beans and hot fat somewhere off to the side as we sat on our cases and waited for Dad. He was talking forcibly to another Scot high up in a window of an office above the platform. There were smiles and a handshake and Dad came back with tickets for all of us on The Flying Scotsman, destination Wakefield Yorkshire.
Dad waited till we were on the train before he said the man had loaned him the money in good faith and I inwardly groaned, that meant the man would be whistling for his money and would never get paid. I hate it when Dad does this it's so humiliating! We even had enough money for tea and a sticky bun and I didn't want one. I glared at my Dad but he didn't catch my glance as he stuck into his bun, I hoped he would choke on it, deceiving that man. so.
We all arrived at my Auntie Pams in Outreach and she was delighted, so delighted. Auntie Pam is a great big woman, massive bosoms let loose in a nightie the size of a circus tent. I hoped she wouldn't bend over as those massive things looked like they shouldn't be let loose. I am so glad we are staying here, Jenny and I as there is a bathroom all done out. Roses carpet in there and all pink and white and smells divine.
The others go off in a taxi to Grandma's who we meet tomorrow but Auntie Pam has already said it's a shared loo with 8 other tenants in a cement block outside. I look out at the snow on the ground and smile. That means Jay will be cold when he slogs off to the loo, hope he freezes his bum off. On the way here he kept telling me to shut my mouth, don't speak. Jesus. He's only 19 babbing months older than me. Who does he think he is ?
A God walks in, looking like Elvis and it's my cousin Ken, 16 years old like Jenny and I see her perk up straight away. He rides a motor bike and promises to take us for a ride. He's Auntie Pams youngest son, there is another Andrew but he is married and lives elsewhere. Jenny and I stare unashamedly at Ken, he is so very good looking. He has a mate with him and they tease us about our Aussie accents. We tease them about their Yorkshire ones, Malcolm, the mate says,
"Well I'm off laking, I'll shut t door on me way out"
Jenny says to Ken,
"What did he say?"
"He's off out to play, and he will shut the door on the way out"
There apparently is no "the" in the Yorkshire language then, it's either missed out all together or you have you say T instead, said as a Tuh as in Huh.
I practice the new way of speaking until it's time for bed and Jenny gives me a clout for being annoying. She's so superior at her age, I have always been annoying to her and it's something I mean to contunue. We're sharing a double bed and she ignores me as I go to chatter and turns her back on me. I'm lying here in England I say to myself, England, I can't beleive it. It;s my home, where I was born, so very strange and yet somehow mine. I can't make head nor tail of it and fall into a dreamless sleep.
Ken is here this morning early and Jenny and I scarmble to bathe and dress. Ther's no shower in the bathroom, just a big bath and a hand basin, and a toilet. Thats a pain as I am forever on it and Jenny screams at me to get out. I of course ignore he and go on tidying my hair and sweep it up into a small beehiave to see how it will look. Jenny is red in the face by the time I am finished and I congratulate myself for getting one back on her.
Ken is downstairs with some friends, girl ones, and they all start talking at once. They are all Jenny;s age but they include me in their conversation. All of them smoke and Jenny and I look at them like they are aliens. Jesus, God, I think, fancy smoking at their age. They invite us to a club for that night, and I think, Yes! But of course my dumb sister has to say in front of everyone that I'm only 12.
"Dress her up", says Lorraine one of the girls.
"Yeah, put some make up on her and she'll pass for 16", ays the other girl, Moira.
I'm begging mentally for Jenn to say OK and she does. I'm dizzy with excitement and can't wait for tonight.
Auntie Pam gets up and we get to meet my Uncle Dave. He's a gravel voiced Yorkshireman, and he smokes like a train, coughing up gunk into a hankie, that he inspects the contents of before tucking it into his pocket. We eat breakfast at a gate legged table that normally sits againt the wall. Auntie Pam pulls it out with a flourish. Jenny and I go into the kitchen to help her prepare and there isn't enough room for all of us in there.
It's so tiny.
Auntie Pam call it her "Galley" kitchen and it's no more than al sliver of a room with countertops on either side, a stove and a sink, a washer tucked under one of the benches. There are cupboards over head full of hidden delights. Auntie Pam is no slouch when it comes to food, obviously. She shoos us out of the kitchen and we sit on chairs at the gate leg table. We shyly chat to Uncle Dave and can only make out one word of two of what he is saying. I nod politely at what I hope are the right bits and shake my head at others.
Jenny looks just as bewildered as me. Auntie Pam sets down huge plates of breakfast in front of us. Tiny little sausages, and streaky bacon, eggs, beans, tomatoes and fried bread. I am starving and I eat everything. Big pots of tea are made and we drink cup after cup Jenny and I, just to be polite. Jenny is a biggish girl a lot bigger than me. I have never been able to wear her hand me downs as I am as scrawny as a stick. Thin arms, thin legs, biggish bust for my age. no waist and the bane of my life, thin blonde hair, whispy and staright.
Jenny is pretty, plump, and has long thick curly hair which is a hairdressers dream and I have been told this all my life. Jenny is a bitch about it and pees herself laughing when as a kid of 6 or 7 Mum would try and rag roll my hair or curl it with hot tongs. Jenny would roll on the floor with laughter as you could see the curl drop out before your eyes.And once again I would be back to straight hair in what she called "My Roman Soldier" haircut. Straight fringe, cut around my ears and straight across the back.
So this afternoon with the help of Auntie Pam and lots of lacquer and pins we get it up in a chignon for the club. Mum and Dad we haven't told as we can't reach them by phone at Grandmas. Jenny says we're not staying long anyway. Lorraine brings an empire line dress for me from her house and we all wear stocking and high heels. I must look old enough as I get past the bouncer at the door with the crowd of us that has grown to ten.
Inside the hall is smoke and music and noise. Jenny disappears immediately, off with her new found friends and straight away a boy comes up and asks me to dance. I am tempted to resist as I have never danced with a boy before except at those tedious old barn dances we used to go to in Canowindra. All sweaty palmed old men and tall boys that danced with us and swung me off my feet as I was so little. So I dance with him and the next thing we are kissing.
I am in love! It's heaven to be kissing this boy on the dance floor and we sit back down rather suddenly and there is more kissing and his tongue is inside my mouth and it feels very strange.
